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text ★ 003 (end of Mar 20)

Welp
I'm drunk in bed all alone on my birthday
Someone should come fix this

[ And a few moment later, Bucky edits his transmission for clarity and crowd control. And disappointed parent faces. ]

And if that wasn't implicitly clear
This is an adult slumber party
With adult activities
And adult drinks
In adult situations

[ So, chilluns, please don't come in here harshing Bucky's boner okay? HE'S LOOKING AT YOU, LINK!! DON'T YOU COME IN HERE WITH YOUR QUESTIONS. ]

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So we're going to slink into bed together and do our taxes and ponder the existential miseries of encroaching middle age? [The most adult of adult activities.]

Wow speak for yourself
I am a spry 21 today
You're on your own with that mid-life crisis

Although I hear 21 year olds are really good at combating those

[ WOW BUCKY NO ]

Bummer. I hear that existential miseries love company.

I thought step one was getting a red convertible and then a 21 year old.

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You have two hands.

[fukkin ice cold]

Edited 2016-03-21 02:59 (UTC)

Yeah well Suzie and Delilah get a little one note after awhile
This is where I would say "Know what I mean?"
But I'm not sure you do
So...

I'm not the one crying for pity sex on the network.

[FIRST OF ALL HES TOTALLY SECURE IN HIS CELIBACY. SECONDLY he came out to hassle you like a good friend and hes honestly feeling so attacked right now.....]

Edited 2016-03-21 03:18 (UTC)

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Oh my god

Why did you even text this to the network

[ He has a strange feeling he's going to start corralling the kid and he's not ready to be a father tbh ]

Why NOT

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Did you just booty call the entire ship.

Booty call?

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text; god he's trying so hard

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text; omg

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text >> action

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Are you asking someone to come over to our room and fuck? Should I find somewhere else to sleep?

I'll owe you one, I swear! A favor from Bucky is very valuable. [ And then because he's too drunk to listen to his survival instincts. ] Unless you wanna be that special lady tonight. I'll let you top?

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Next time I see you drunk I'm wrapping your hand in tape so you can't use your MID.

Wow how rude
So rude
The rudest!

Instead of being negative
Why don't you come over
I can finish climbing you like I said I would

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I thought romance was supposed to be dead in the future. Where's the wooing? The flowers? The thinly veiled attempts to make it sound like more than sex?

Look shoot me alright?
I don't got time for real wooing right now

Besides who turns down free sex with a handsome fella like me

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[Was this guy serious? Venom had only spoken to him once and that was about the cardboard tank.]

you asking for sex on the network? thought a guy like you would have had a girlfriend or something.

[Because he doesn't have a clue about teenage romance or anything. He's too old for that.]

Aww you flatterer
But no
I'm a lone wolf
Destined to be on my own with only the occasional companionship

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A for boldness
F for delivery

[ That would have even made Kaylee cringe. ]

Edited 2016-03-22 00:34 (UTC)

So that averages out to a C right?
That's a passing grade!

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[oh dear what is this. sorry but j's really struggling not to laugh at him here.]

Oh. Very smooth, charmer.

Tell me about it. It's a gift really...

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\voice

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What happens if more than one take you up on that?

[ ...hello. :x ]

[ A wild Bucky appears! ]

Then I'm a very lucky boy and it's going to be one helluva good night!

Why
Do you need me to pencil you in?
I'm a pretty good snuggler
I'll let you be the big spoon

Edited 2016-03-23 23:19 (UTC)

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