All This Shit is Weird: The Weirdening

[neverheardofhim]

You ever think that someone is writing our lives, and we're part of some comedy shitshow that the gods are playing out? If that's the case, then I'd like to have a talk with whoever's in charge.

Shadow demons? I can name at least five Thedosian books that played it better. Caught up on feelings and regrets toward people? There are better ways to damage a person. I can think of twenty bad memories that we didn't even touch on.

That's why, if you want good plot twists and thrilling concepts, you should subscribe to Tentacles and Shields publishing. This month we'll be producing a story about last month: The Shadow and its Paramore. Stay tuned for details.

Comments

[neverheardofhim]

No one could ever compete with you, scribbles.

[tearsinajar]

That's what upsets me the most, Varric. One reality doesn't make another. The things I learned here, about my future, about my daughter, my marriage... it might not even happen.

[liberaltus]

You're witty, that's your best feature as I happen to like witty so you'll always be my favorite dwarf. As a point of curiosity, what has the Inquisitor all in a twist?

Lovelorn Chantry sister? Are you lovelorn? Regardless, my ear is always open and it has been very sympathetic as of late, so if you really want a serious conversation...

...I do keep plenty of wine in stock or a good stout if you'd rather.

[shadowblends]

it helps, that's for certain. maybe i should do circus tricks to lighten the mood from now on!

i wouldn't mind it, but do you actually want to hear about the same thing over and over again?

[shashka]

Intriguing. I'll take my chances on that one, I guess.

[ as an accomplished liar, he can always appreciate a good story. however... ]

But, in my experience, there's never been a single story that hasn't changed with each different version.

[ and the Soviet Union does love writing some people out of history. ]

[sketchycharacter]

just make sure to get me the manuscript in plenty of time. i'm gonna do my best work for you.

[businessinfront]

... I'm guessing that's sarcasm.

[neverheardofhim]

Guess you'll just have to promise me something, then.
Promise that you won't be going anywhere?

[neverheardofhim]

Andraste's ass, no I'm not lovelorn. It's a turn of phrase, Sparkler.

[He definitely wasn't nursing some complicated wounds from an even more complicated confession. He wasn't sure how public he wanted that particular incident to be, however. ]

I won't say no to a stiff drink and good company though.

[neverheardofhim]

Can't hurt. If nothing else, I might enjoy the show.

Of course I don't mind, Spades. Listening is what I do.

[neverheardofhim]

Trust me, not telling the truth would have bit me in the ass more than telling the truth did. Everything in that book is completely accurate. Just ask any of my friends here.

[He might have been content to leave it at that, but a few moments of thought (mostly centering around one pesky elf, had him typing once more.]

The truth just... varies a little, depending on who you ask.

[tearsinajar]

[ Varric, her heart just cracked a little. ]

If only I weren't over here in r2 with Adrien, I'd give you the biggest hug and not let go.

[ He has to realize how much he's asking of her. There can't be any other promises. It's too easy for them to be broken in such a world that's unsteady, too much still unknown of it.

Her first tear falls onto screen of her tab, her fingers typing. ]

I promise.

[neverheardofhim]

You're a true friend, Drake.

Doing alright after that big fiasco? Haven't had much time to touch base -- been out too much trying to fix things around town.

[shadowblends]

i don't think anyone's actually seen me perform here. it'd be a nice change of pace.

[a pause, probably seeming too long as he contemplates then finally decides:] okay, sure.

[Talking more about it can sometimes help, right?]

[neverheardofhim]

You figure that out all on your own?

[neverheardofhim]

Hug the good doctor for me, then? I'm sure he'll appreciate it.

[The image of Adrien being latched onto was amusing enough, and he had to pause in his typing while he waited for the chuckles to subside.]

I thought I lost you once. It... wasn't a pleasant feeling. Believe it or not, I actually rather enjoy your company.

[liberaltus]

Yes well, a mopey Varric is also unexpected; so for all I know you very well could be.

[That Varric could be anything short of cynical, witty, and sarcastic? It was certainly new to Dorian...so what else could be new.]

Well you can have both any time you wish, my door is always...well maybe not always, but it's usually open.

[neverheardofhim]

I'll second that. Especially since all I've done is talk about myself.
You can do it after we chat though.
Deal?

[neverheardofhim]

Should I be watching for a tell-tale sock on the door before my visits, then? Just in case?

[toservelife]

[From her perspective, talking about demons as ghosts and spirits seems like the weird thing. Even just listening to her tribe talk about spirits was exercise in keeping her mouth shut.]

Uh-huh. [OK, almost shut.

And she can hear him grinning, which makes her grin in turn even while wondering if she's the butt of the joke.]

OK, I believe you. Shadow spirits that had to be vanquished with feelings.

Is that kind of thing normal here?

[liberaltus]

Maker's breath, just because I lock my door doesn't mean I'm doing anything, it just means knock.

[shadowblends]

listening to or reading about you is interesting.
sounds like a plan to me!

[sketchycharacter]

eh, a demonic version of my brother tried to beat me up, but that's not even in my top ten worst days ever. weirdest maybe, but not worst. i'm all right.

[nishizono]

it's not weird if you're peddling furry/tentacle porn sure
not that that doesn't have a market

[shashka]

Doesn't it always?

[ something he knows all too well. ]

If it's a good story, does it really matter in the long run?