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[forwardmomentum]

Personnel Officer Miles Vorkosigan here. Due to the recent influx of new crewmembers onto the Moira, my job has gotten far busier and more complex by about a factor of ten. Not that I mind putting a few extra hours in, but this is no longer a one-man job, let alone for a man with two jobs. So, with that in mind, there are two new Personnel Officer postings available for any who might be interested in assisting with the workload. If you've got a knack for paperwork and find desk jockeying an appealing career opportunity, I'd be glad to have you on board. At any rate, anyone who's interested in the job should take a look at the posting and get in touch with the captains.

And there's one other matter: it seems that last month I received yet another mystery package from the postal Russian roulette that is the Ingress and, unsurprisingly, it does not belong to me.

[ attached is an image of a crate full of assorted shoes. ]

But I have a sneaking suspicion some of these belong to someone -- many someones -- on the ship. In fact, I'd bet you Betan dollars that more than a few of you will find something that belongs to you in that crate. It's in the cargo bay if you want to have a look. Vorkosigan out.

The crate contains:
Ratchet's gravity boots
A previous 616 Bucky's combat boots
Fennel's boots
Eily's pretty shoes
The 10th Doctor's gym shoes
Elizabeth Dewitt's shoes
Bel Thorne's gray boots
Clare's slip-resistant sensible shoes
Breq's shoes
Steve Rogers' boots ( x2)
The Courier's boots
Lara Croft's boots
Napoleon Solo's shoes
Cyrus' shoes
Medusalith's shoes
Papyrus' sneakers
Dutch Velders' boots
Cordelia's shoes
Crona & Ragnarok's nightengale boots
Trish Walker's shoes
Scott Lang's shoes
Peter Maximoff's sneakers
Beast Boy's shoes
Joseph Joestar's shoes
Leonard Snart's combat boots
Maya's left high heel and right boot
Edward Elric's boots

Comments

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[hellsbel]

[it might be difficult to make out the words at first because so much lol.]

I am not taking that bet. Though I will take this as quantifiable proof that the Ingress has a sense of humor. [and it's an AWFUL one! }D hasn't felt this tolerant about the Ingress in, like, ever.]

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[knaval]

WHY DO U HAV SO MANY JOBS
especialy paper work

im surprised magnus hasnt tried to get u to hire him
unles he has and u said no

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[isdronning]

This may come as an odd question, but as a Personnel Officer, how much of the job is paperwork, and how much is dealing with crew members?

[ Elsa's looking for a way out of a job she's absolutely not qualified for, okay, but the idea of a job with too much interaction with people may not be the answer.

Still, worth asking, right? She doesn't mind the idea of paperwork, at least... ]

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[takeitslow]

Getting a bunch of random shoes is actually super creepy. It's like something a serial killer would send you.

[neveroutwrenched]

your message SAYS 'inadvertently received a package'

but i'm reading

'weirdo who steals shoes.'

[voice]

[ryuuzaki]

I don't think my shoes are in there. However, if anyone sees them --

[The voice is clearly that of a youngish man, British to people who can pick up the accent. He trails off in a tone that suggests resignation to the hopeless shoe situation -- without bothering to describe the shoes in question -- then continues on a new tack.]

What do you think of the Personnel Officer position?

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[gentlemenpreferblondes]

[Now this is hilarious. Although she's eyeing the shoe pile to see if there's anything good there.]

nice collection, mr. miles. you could put up a show.

[ersatzeverything]

Yeah, some of those are mine.

[No they aren't, Deacon's just a compulsive liar.

And also he'll definitely take any unclaimed shoes that are even close to fitting. You can never have too many shoes. Getting the right kind of shoes for an outfit is all part of assembling a good disguise.]

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[smoothaf]

I think I do see mine in your pile.

[Like Deacon he's also going to claim shoes that aren't his along with them. Although unlike Deacon he's going to be more picky about what he takes.]

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[rraidergirl]

You got my boots!

[ How's that for some sheer surprised delight. ]

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[diamondslap]

Two jobs?
Good heavens, darling.
Watching Peasant's Madness overtake a poor soul in real time is quite shocking.

[handing]

Good luck with the hunt for new applicants. Hopefully whoever does apply will be able to shoulder the responsibility.

[Sadly enough, if Pepper were to go for it she'd probably be pretty perfect at it. But that would mean abandoning her position as Chief Morale Officer, which in too many ways feels like a defeat for her.]