AUDIO / backdated a little

[notoriousdeathmonster]

Hey, so, if this thing really works like it's supposed to and it repeats whatever I say to it to everyone else... [SIGH.] I could kind of use some help. If anyone's by the feeding area? I need someone to go in there for me and get me something to eat, because whoever built this magic flying boat just HAD to cover EVERYTHING there in WOOD so I can't go in there without setting the whole thing on fire –

[She breaks off with a huff. She is really kind of embarrassed by having to ask for this – she does not like it at all. What's a good way to stop yourself feeling embarrassed? Oblique threats, probably. So:]

And, well, if nobody does go get me something, then I'll have to work out some other way to get food, and I'm pretty sure no one's going to like that.

Comments

[kickbancaboose]

[ what the fuck. on fire? either this lady's a pyromaniac, or she's got serious problems with woodwork. ]

Uh. Well. I like eating and I'm also pretty cool with not being on fire while I eat, so if you tell me what you want I can maybe swing by and grab something for you.

[notoriousdeathmonster]

I don't care as long as it's meat – a decent amount of meat, not a tiny scavenger portion. Obviously it'd be best if I could hunt it for myself, but it doesn't look like that's happening any time soon.

[kickbancaboose]

Right, so like . . . two steaks? Maybe three?

[notoriousdeathmonster]

I don't know – what's a steak?

[kickbancaboose]

Damn, lady, you've never had a steak? That's seriously fucked up.

[ what a miserable, post-apocalyptic world she must live in. ]

A steak is when you kill a cow and then smother it in seasoning before cooking it 'til it's kind of brown but sort of still pink. Unless you like it well done, and in that case you're an inconsiderate jerk wasting a perfectly good dead cow.

[niffin]

[ This sounds like a bigger problem than the immediate. She just...isn't going to ask why everything would catch fire, even if the question is burning (har) her up. It's probably just a matter of time before a sentient Bic lighter pops through the Ingress. ]

That sucks. Is there anywhere else in the ship you need to visit, and can't?

[notoriousdeathmonster]

Not really. Like, I don't really want to go in the gardens or the library, so...

[niffin]

Good. We can probably figure out something better than just getting people to bring you food — though that seems to be working so far.

It can't be too hard to figure out a fire-retardant to treat things with, and that'd be a good thing to have on hand anyway. You should be able to go where you like on the ship. Especially if there's an emergency where you need to.

[notoriousdeathmonster]

A... fire retardant? What's that mean? Is that whatever magic they've used to make sure most of the stuff on this ship doesn't burn?

[niffin]

More like a potion. You can use it to treat certain materials. So it takes more to make them burn, and so it burns less of it. They're not perfect, where I'm from,

[ Unless you are using magic, but Alice doesn't intend to spend that kind of energy on a problem with simpler solutions. ]

But I bet they could make better ones here.

[scowls]

[ Fenris does not appreciate threats. ]

And I am quite certain that you will not enjoy the consequences of threatening me or mine.

[notoriousdeathmonster]

[Honestly, Peril wanted to make a good impression here. She honestly did. She just. You know. Faced with something like this she can't not be a jerk.

Of course, it's not like she didn't start it...]

Oh, please. Isn't everything here some kind of tiny scavenger-human thing?

[scowls]

[ Very faint disgust shades Fenris' voice now. ]

I am no human.

[notoriousdeathmonster]

[Another dragon? No, she decides, she would definitely be able to tell...

She scoffs, channelling some of the condescending smugness she learned from Scarlet.]

Well, I'd be happy to eat something bigger than a human.

[scowls]

[ Smugness he's familiar with. That's ever magister he's ever met. Fenris sneers. ]

And I would be happy to rip your heart out if you tried.

[acerbic]

[ THIS SOUNDS LIKE IT COULD BE EXCITING. Or dangerous. Because he's thinking she's probably some sort of rage demon. But, even if that's true that'll lighten up the day. ]

I'll bite. [ ha ha. ] What do you eat? [ There's only a beat of a pause before he continues, the interest barely restrained in his tone: ] And why would you set everything on fire? Angry? Boredom? Just like starting fires? Towering rage demon set to destroy everything in your path even though this place isn't so terrible?

[notoriousdeathmonster]

Meat. Any kind of meat. And... [She sighs, a little impatiently.] It's my scales, everything I touch burns whether I want it to or not.

[acerbic]

[ Scales. Well. That certainly lends to something—but he's not getting excited just yet. ]

All right. Where are you? I'll plunder the kitchen for some meat.

[notoriousdeathmonster]

I'm just by the kitchen, I only found out I couldn't go in when I got there.

video;

[leanandgreen]

Woah woah, wait. Why would you set everything on fire, exactly?

I mean, I'm the assistant chef, I can totally hook you up if you need me to? But you gotta give me the scoop on that one first.

[notoriousdeathmonster]

Whoah, you can... see people through this thing too?

[There's some scrabbling of claws, and then Peril's scaly orange snout appears on the screen. She's wide-eyed.]

Does that work? Can you see me??

[leanandgreen]

[Are those... scales? Beast Boy leans in a little closer, squinting.]

Kind of... I think you've gotta back up a little! Try holding your wrist thingy a little further away from your face.

[notoriousdeathmonster]

[She leans back slightly; blinks.]

Like this?

[soulist]

You got anything specific you want to eat? I'm one of the cooks here so...I could make you something if you're in need of a special diet.

[ Totally asking for a take out order for a dragon like it's nbd. Cyrus has seen things, talking dragons isn't the weirdest of them. ]

[notoriousdeathmonster]

Make something...? I just eat meat, I don't need anyone to do anything to it.