video;

[saidsarcastically]

[It takes him a minute to figure out how to work the MID. Sure, he's from 2287, but he's far too used to the bulkier tech with lots of nobs and buttons and switches.]

My name's William. I've been assigned as the Child Protection Officer.

[He wonders if the captains have a really twisted sense of humor. "Hey, let's give the guy with the kidnapped son the job of looking after all the children!" Either way, it's his job and he intends to do it.]

What that means is, I'm supposed to make sure you rascals are safe. So, yeah, don't run with scissors, or play with fire, yadda yadda. [He's obviously joking, but after a moment he adds with a little less of his joking tone:] If any of you feel like you're in some kind of danger or need any kind of help, feel free to contact me.

You can find me at the bar mostly.

[Quickly adding:]

Kidding, kidding.

[Behind every joke there's some truth.]

Comments

[heart_breaking]

[The dismembered hand reaches all on its own for Chara's face. It catches Chara by surprise, drawing the first unguarded squawk of this encounter.]

[There's only a split second to see it happen, and then Chara is reeling back with sputtering choking as they try mightily to smother any laughter that follows. This sounds like strangled crying, right? It's a failing attempt, since they're wheezing so hard their knees are weak. It's too much.]

H-Help, it's... it's attacking me! I can't beat it, I'm too weak, I'm...

[Oh no. They shouldn't.]

I'm... disarmed...

[... yeah. They should. Chara kind of crumbles on the spot, dropping out of the camera's view and laughing too hard at their own joke to make a sound.]

[saidsarcastically]

[...

The range of expression on his face so very visibly goes from worry to "what the fuck" to "okay this isn't right" to "I hate my life" in seconds flat. He stops in the hall, staring, processing what's happening with the strangled cries that just weren't right and the punny joke.

Oh.

This is probably some kind of karma. For being a little shit growing up and just being a little shit in general, even now. That's it right? Because this is exactly the kind of prank or joke he would find hysterical directed at someone else.

It takes him a long moment as he stares before a sigh escapes him. A frustrated, long suffering sigh as he shakes his head.]

--Wait, so...

[his tone is serious - serious enough that it almost looks like he's really annoyed. Like he's about to give the lecture to end all lectures.]

...you two don't need a hand after all?

[Yep.]

[devilofohara]

[Robin lets out an audible sigh as Chara loses their shit on the floor. She had been hoping to keep this going a while longer - but apparently Chara's couldn't keep up their serious demeanor in the face of a practical joke.

She's a little disappointed - but at the same time, she can't help but smile at her friend's laughing fit.]

...I think we have a pretty good handle on it now, thanks.

[heart_breaking]

[Chara drags themself back into view. Their cheeks are red and they have to fight to talk without laughing.]

Y-yeah, we... we'll...

... we'll take care of the wrist from here...

[They're wheezing, now. Once again they retreat out of the camera's range, this time deliberately.]

[saidsarcastically]

[Man he can't even be annoyed right now.]

That got way out of hand. Risks like that will cost you and arm and a leg you know.