video;

[saidsarcastically]

[It takes him a minute to figure out how to work the MID. Sure, he's from 2287, but he's far too used to the bulkier tech with lots of nobs and buttons and switches.]

My name's William. I've been assigned as the Child Protection Officer.

[He wonders if the captains have a really twisted sense of humor. "Hey, let's give the guy with the kidnapped son the job of looking after all the children!" Either way, it's his job and he intends to do it.]

What that means is, I'm supposed to make sure you rascals are safe. So, yeah, don't run with scissors, or play with fire, yadda yadda. [He's obviously joking, but after a moment he adds with a little less of his joking tone:] If any of you feel like you're in some kind of danger or need any kind of help, feel free to contact me.

You can find me at the bar mostly.

[Quickly adding:]

Kidding, kidding.

[Behind every joke there's some truth.]

Comments

text

[arcreact]

you're supposed to tell them to stay in school
c'mon
don't make me do your job for you

[ BECAUSE CERTAINLY TONY STARK IS AN EXPERT HERE ]

text

[saidsarcastically]

that was implied in the "yadda yadda"
i got the important ones down, all right

[They're both obviously experts.]

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[arcreact]

honestly, pal, that's just lazy
think of the children

text

[saidsarcastically]

i did
hence the "dont run with scissors"

oh wait i forgot "say no to drugs", damn.

text

[arcreact]

I thought that was included under "yada yada"
but honestly, don't feel too bad, we all have that day job we're no good at

and next time I catch a kid doing spacedrugs I'll be sure to send them your way

text

[saidsarcastically]

hey hey dealing with kids is tough work
even the army isn't this rough

but thanks i'll be sure to give them a long drawn out speech about the damages of drugs to the brain and hopefully ruin it for them forever.

[Though to be honest Deacon is probably best for shaming people for their space drug use.]

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[arcreact]

you can try, anyway
between you and me
I think those talks usually have the opposite effect

basically I do not envy you your job at all
good luck, man

text

[saidsarcastically]

if i don't make it out of this alive


walk my dog for me or he'll shit around the beds

text

[arcreact]

uh, sorry pal, I don't pet sit
I can instruct him to keep it to your bed, though

text

[saidsarcastically]

fine fine

dont leave your shoes out though