video;

[saidsarcastically]

[It takes him a minute to figure out how to work the MID. Sure, he's from 2287, but he's far too used to the bulkier tech with lots of nobs and buttons and switches.]

My name's William. I've been assigned as the Child Protection Officer.

[He wonders if the captains have a really twisted sense of humor. "Hey, let's give the guy with the kidnapped son the job of looking after all the children!" Either way, it's his job and he intends to do it.]

What that means is, I'm supposed to make sure you rascals are safe. So, yeah, don't run with scissors, or play with fire, yadda yadda. [He's obviously joking, but after a moment he adds with a little less of his joking tone:] If any of you feel like you're in some kind of danger or need any kind of help, feel free to contact me.

You can find me at the bar mostly.

[Quickly adding:]

Kidding, kidding.

[Behind every joke there's some truth.]

Comments

[bosswald]

And you're their only guardian?

[She sounds and looks more than a little bothered by that fact.]

[saidsarcastically]

Jesus, I hope not.

[He's laughing as he says it but he really hopes he's not the only one with some kind of child protection job title.]

I'm sure there are others.

[bosswald]

I'm going to speak to the captains, and ask that I take on child protective duties to help you. And whoever else is assigned the task, of course.

[She's happy now, to finally find some kind of purpose she enjoys and is motivated by.]

I'm a nanny back home, and I'm also in the process of becoming a teacher in London. I'd like to make sure the children on board are well cared for and properly educated, if you don't mind my assisting you. I've been assigned the position of gardner, but I don't see any harm in taking on another title.

[saidsarcastically]

Seriously?

[He wasn't expecting that!]

Hey, if you're up for it, I won't say no to help. I'm...well, I'm a new father. Going from looking after one kid to a bunch threw me for a loop.

[bosswald]

A new father.

[Clara says it fondly, because she wants to be a mother someday.]

I'm sorry you have to be away from your baby, but it sounds as if the captains were smart putting you in charge of the children here.

[saidsarcastically]

[He wants to argue that, but the last thing he's going to do is put one of his big major insecurities out there.]

I've already got the dad jokes down. If that doesn't qualify me for dealing with children then nothing does.

[bosswald]

I don't know how the children will be able to not love you, if you've got dad jokes mastered. The day you make them all laugh means you've won them over, I think.

[saidsarcastically]

Well, this'll be a true challenge then, considering I usually only make myself laugh.

[bosswald]

Oh, that can't be true. Go on, tell me a joke.

[saidsarcastically]

[You'll live to regret this, Clara.]

All right.

[He clears his throat.]

What do you call someone with no body and no nose?

...

...

Nobody knows.

[And true to his word, he makes himself laugh.]

[bosswald]

[It's almost so simple that she doesn't get it at first, because it's something Angie would tell her after seeing a joke on a candy wrapper or something of the sort. But once she does, she can't help but smile and chuckle, because he's so into his own awful jokes that it's adorable. She ducks her head to try and hide her amusement, because she doesn't want to hurt his feelings.]

Very punny. Almost. Very clever, at least.

[saidsarcastically]

[Honestly even getting a smile and/or chuckle is good enough feedback for him. Sometimes he just likes to be amusing, even if he's only amusing himself half the time.]

I'm nothing if I'm not punny.

[A small laugh.]

Oooh, these kids are going to hate me.