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[CLOSE UP on Sideswipe's dumb face. He's got his head propped up on his hands, lying on the floor of the observation deck, feet kicking in the air. Honestly, he just looks bored.]

Soooo...

What is there to do on this stupid ship? I mean, you guys don't even have the movie channels! Or like, video games, except on these comm things.

[He holds up a hand, shifting to rest on his other elbow. The hand is... moving like he's making it talk.]

But Sideswipe, there's a whole planet you could go hang out on! It's super cool with giant flying monsters!

Oh, yeah, I know. It's awesome. But, apparently, you make one lame choice and you're "grounded".

[Why yes there are air quotes.]

So what's a bot to do around here?

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I find complaining about things helps, so you're halfway there.

[Worst part is, he's not even remotely being sarcastic.]

Library's got a load of books if you're into that sort of thing. [He sure is, anyway.] Beyond that I'm still getting the hang of the place, so I've mostly been busying myself with exercising and people watching.

[He raises an eyebrow, curiosity overtaking his face.]

The hell did you do to get grounded?

Whooooo... go me.

Pfff, books are for losers. Sorry, dude. Not my kind of fun.

[His face scrunches up.]

Rode a space whale.

Don't have to apologize to me, I know some people aren't into them. I really just have what I do myself to suggest. Other than that... exercising, training, staring at people... They really need to get a bigger selection of games on these things.

[Very helpful. His eyes widen a bit.]

You rode a--

[That's pretty damn cool. Going on a joyride always is.]

Was it fun?

Grounded? [He's never been used to anything but the very literal meaning of that term, but it's effectively the same, right?]

What did you do?

[~~The king of bad choices wants to know.~~]

Wait, were you the one that fell and lost his arm?

[ If so, man, bravo! ]

Yeah! Or like, something to watch. Space is cool and all, but there's no drama, y'know? No action!

[Sideswipe relax, just you wait.]

Oh man. It was so great! Until we fell off, but still!

Yeah, for now.

[He shrugs a little.]

Me, Tailgate and Riptide tried to ride one of those whale things. Apparently that was "stupid".

Psh, no!

Riptide is fine, by the way.

[He'd expect grounded to involve being stuck, well, on the ground, but that's probably not worth arguing about.]

On whose authority?

Literally the scariest guy in history. Like... the guy who straight-up obliterated half of Cybertron.

I mean... he doesn't have to know I'm gone, but seriously? Terrifying.

No action? Really? And here I'd been hoping for something.

[He seems a little disappointed, before perking up a bit upon hearing about his adventure.]

Heh, I've fallen off things I've taken a joyride in before. [Such as a one forty-something foot Metal Gear.] They not appreciate you falling off or something?

I have no idea what that means. So not the captains of this ship, or anyone on the planet?

Nah, Megatron. Hold on.

[There's a pause, and then scribbling sounds. Before...]

Him!

Unless you count watching stars go by as 'action', then, not a bit, dude. Sorry.

[At least he's not the only one who feels this way.]

Yeah? Like what? [A beat, and then:] Weeeeeeeeell...

Riptide sort of. Broke his arm off. Because we hit the planet.

[This clarifies matters less than you might expect, strange large droid.]

I guess you wouldn't wanna disagree with a face like that...

Nooooo way.

I am not exaggerating the teeth. Just sayin'.

So what'd you do?

Oh. Me, Riptide and Tailgate roped one of those flying whale things down on the planet.

And then we rode it for a while until it kicked us off.

....Wow.

That's not action at all unless someone's, I don't know, getting tossed into them or something.

[Incredibly, incredibly disappointing. But, well, never say never, right?]

Like, say, a helicopter, or a giant walking tank. [Normal things, no big deal.]

Ah. I suppose that'd do it. Is he alright? I've heard they can work bloody miracles in the medical areas. [Rumors, possibly.]

[Have an unsettlingly villainous chuckle.]

The teeth and drool are a nice touch.

I kinda hope no one's getting chucked into a star, but yeah, agreed.

[As long as no one but 'bad guys' die, right?]

Walking tank? Like... a Decepticon?

[Another shrug.] Well, yeah, he got it popped back on and everything. He's okay.

I know! Right? Awesome.

[SHDFJKH;SDFDSJ]

[SHIT SHIT SHIT ABORT]

...

I still say you can't ground me for real!

I'm surprised they got you back out.

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