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[CLOSE UP on Sideswipe's dumb face. He's got his head propped up on his hands, lying on the floor of the observation deck, feet kicking in the air. Honestly, he just looks bored.]

Soooo...

What is there to do on this stupid ship? I mean, you guys don't even have the movie channels! Or like, video games, except on these comm things.

[He holds up a hand, shifting to rest on his other elbow. The hand is... moving like he's making it talk.]

But Sideswipe, there's a whole planet you could go hang out on! It's super cool with giant flying monsters!

Oh, yeah, I know. It's awesome. But, apparently, you make one lame choice and you're "grounded".

[Why yes there are air quotes.]

So what's a bot to do around here?

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Yeah! Or like, something to watch. Space is cool and all, but there's no drama, y'know? No action!

[Sideswipe relax, just you wait.]

Oh man. It was so great! Until we fell off, but still!

No action? Really? And here I'd been hoping for something.

[He seems a little disappointed, before perking up a bit upon hearing about his adventure.]

Heh, I've fallen off things I've taken a joyride in before. [Such as a one forty-something foot Metal Gear.] They not appreciate you falling off or something?

Unless you count watching stars go by as 'action', then, not a bit, dude. Sorry.

[At least he's not the only one who feels this way.]

Yeah? Like what? [A beat, and then:] Weeeeeeeeell...

Riptide sort of. Broke his arm off. Because we hit the planet.

That's not action at all unless someone's, I don't know, getting tossed into them or something.

[Incredibly, incredibly disappointing. But, well, never say never, right?]

Like, say, a helicopter, or a giant walking tank. [Normal things, no big deal.]

Ah. I suppose that'd do it. Is he alright? I've heard they can work bloody miracles in the medical areas. [Rumors, possibly.]

I kinda hope no one's getting chucked into a star, but yeah, agreed.

[As long as no one but 'bad guys' die, right?]

Walking tank? Like... a Decepticon?

[Another shrug.] Well, yeah, he got it popped back on and everything. He's okay.

It was just the first thing that came to mind. Feel like it'd be a bit extreme, but yeah.

[Considering Liquid's technically a bad guy, he'd rather not die again.]

A... what? I'm not quite sure what that is, but if it's about forty feet high and stomps around a lot, and makes this brilliant roaring noise, then possibly.

Happy ending, then, except for the grounding bit. How long're you in for?

Maybe jetpacks. There's action, and nobody turns to star fuel.

[Or however stars work.]

... yeah some of them totally do. They're uh. Kind of bad news. Major bad news.

Apparently "longer than I've already been alive".

Hmm... sure, that does sound a bit better.

[Chaos everywhere! He can appreciate it.]

Bad news? How so? [And how soon can he wrangle one and utilize it for his own purposes? (Liquid, no.)]

Bloody hell, that seems excessive. Although I guess it depends on how long that was in the first place. But still.

Cool, okay.

Uhh, because they're all like, thieves or murderers or crazy giant monsters who want to kill everyone. That's kinda what the whole war was about. I think.

[Ah, the dubious benefits of being 'born' after a huge interplanetary conflict.]

Dude we live like... millions of years. It could literally be forever.

Ah. I see. Always comes to war, does it? [As a soldier who's worked with people like that (minus the 'giant' part, except for Raven, but he wasn't exactly a giant monster, and he was really just pretty tall and bulky), he can sort of relate. Okay, so when can he wrangle one?]

That's... a long time. [Congratulations on the understatement, Liquid.]

If you're grounded, they should give you a set start and end date. Rather pointless to keep it up in the air if you'll learn your lesson eventually, don't you think?

I guess? I mean, I wouldn't know. It was over before I came around.

[He props his chin in his hands again.]

Yeah! Seriously! Not that I'm really going to listen, but it'd be nice to know how long I don't have to listen for.

Ah, a historical thing. I'm a soldier myself, so I suppose I was just musing about things.

[Getting all philosophical.]

That's the spirit. If they can't even decide how long you're out for, then clearly you should just decide for yourself. If they cared enough, they'd specify.

[He's so encouraging.]

Oh, yeah? Humans have wars?

[Sideswipe. Watch less action movies and more history channel, idiot.]

Hah! Dude, I like that idea.

Of course. All the bloody time, actually. Some of us were practically created for it.

[Or, in his case, literally.]

Thought you might. If the rules are unclear, sometimes you've got to make your own.

Created for it...? What's that mean?

[Humans don't build other humans do they.]

Oh, dude. I've been doing that since I could function.

Well, start someone early enough, and it could easily become their whole life.

[Oooooor they could be cloned from the greatest soldier of the 21st century, but who's counting?]

So have I. A good way of going about things, I'd say.

What, really? Even for humans?

[That's sort of mind-boggling, honestly.]

Well, me too.

Of course. Happens a lot, really. I'd had enough of it and escaped those in charge, but it never stopped anything.

[Cue one incredibly angry kid running around Angola with a knife.]

Good.

Really...? Movies never said anything about that.

Movies? Well, just because the ones you've seen never mentioned it doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

Hell, I've lived it.

That's, uh.

I dunno if that's awesome, scary, or sad, dude.

To me, it's just.... there. A thing. Nothing special. But I suppose those not used to it might have differing opinions.

I guess that makes... sense? A little?

It still sounds like it sucks, dude.

Eh, it might not be the best thing, but I'm used to it. Don't worry about it. I've turned out okay.

[An angry, angry clone who wants to fight everything. One hundred percent okay.]

Well. Okay. If you're sure.

And stuff.

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