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[CLOSE UP on Sideswipe's dumb face. He's got his head propped up on his hands, lying on the floor of the observation deck, feet kicking in the air. Honestly, he just looks bored.]

Soooo...

What is there to do on this stupid ship? I mean, you guys don't even have the movie channels! Or like, video games, except on these comm things.

[He holds up a hand, shifting to rest on his other elbow. The hand is... moving like he's making it talk.]

But Sideswipe, there's a whole planet you could go hang out on! It's super cool with giant flying monsters!

Oh, yeah, I know. It's awesome. But, apparently, you make one lame choice and you're "grounded".

[Why yes there are air quotes.]

So what's a bot to do around here?

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Psh, no!

Riptide is fine, by the way.

Oh. Well, then that's all that matters.

[ Thank God a robot is unarmed GET IT? Unharmed, unarmed HA HA!! ]

So does it hurt? You know, when you pop an arm off?

Don't look at me. It's never happened to me before.

.... Okay, I too have never popped an arm off. But I know it would hurt like Hell. Know what I mean?

So in your imaginings of losing your own arm, would you guess that it hurts?

[ Don't be an asshat here, robot man. ]

A lot?

Dude, I don't know. Humans die from that kind of thing in the movies, and the only other guy I've seen lose an arm turned out to be a Combiner anyway.

How do you not know if you guys feel pain or not? That's all I wanna know!

[ Lord, why is this so difficult to get out of this robot?? ]

Wow, you watch our movies? Are they actually entertaining for you?

Why didn't you just say that? You kept asking like I should know what it feels like to get your arm ripped off!

Uh, yeah. Of course I do? What else am I supposed to watch if I'm stuck on your planet?

I definitely asked that. Subtlety isn't everyone's strong suit...

[ Huff huff don't be sassy he'll be sassy back. ]

What? You're on Earth? Or, well, were on Earth. Why are you on Earth? I mean I've met robots before, but they, uh....... [ were Nazis, and then Bucky and the gang broke 'em. ] not as nice as you, let's put it that way. Or as big!

Dude, no, you were asking about missing arms. And I've definitely never had that happen.

[He'll be sassy all he wants thank you.]

I was on Cybertron until some annoying cop bot decided to drag me along on her stupid mission, and then Bee got all of us zapped through a spacebridge.

Oh yeah, those spacebridges. Always messin' up your day...

[ Bucky has absolutely no idea what he's talking about, so he's just going to be an ass. It's the logical conclusion, right? Right. ]

Yeah.

You have no idea.

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