text;

[justabit]

if someone could theoretically make you anything in you could imagine, what would you ask for

"a way back home" or "ways to contact my family" are stupid ideas and off the table. im not a miracle worker im a scientist

i'm not making any weapons for anyone either so dont ask

beyond that its a free-for-all. making no promises that i'll actually take your suggestion to heart unless its a REALLY good idea or you've got a good bribe

otherwise, nothing's too crazy for me to figure out so really dream big here go nuts

Comments

[niffin]

a cat to english translator

a bag of infinite holding

a collapsible multi person dragon saddle

portable water filters

colour changing hair dye

a mood ring/child leash combo

one of those little drinky birds

a list of better suggestions

[justabit]

[WELL ISN'T THIS PERSON A SMARTASS]

i'm going to make everything on that list just to spite you

[niffin]

awesome. i want that drinky bird.

what's up with asking us all for suggestions, though? seems like you've got ideas of what you want to make already. or at least what you don't want to make

[justabit]

i've got plenty ideas of what i want to make but apparently my job on this ship is to make shit that'll make you fuckers happy

so i might take some side projects just to keep the dickwads that run this place from riding on my dick about not doing my job

[plus he's getting some stuff out of it]

[niffin]

ok, fair point

if you want a legitimate side project here's one i'd actually trade for: a super effective flame retardant. should be pretty easy, i just want the standard boring earth kind but cranked up to 11. like can-actually-sustain-dragon-fire style. "we need to burn this for fuel but some asshole made it like completely impossible to burn" style.

the main incentive is that the place we eat won't catch fire as easily and kill us all, but i can probably figure something out if that's not enough

[justabit]

i could make a flame retardant like that pretty easily, yeah. what's with everyone and dragons though? i mean jesus, it's like a 13 year old's deviantart in here

could care less if this entire ship goes down in flames with me in it, so you'll need to offer me something else in return.

i'm a simple man with simple needs, so i'm sure you can figure something out that's actually worth my time

private;

[niffin]

you see why i want the flame retardant. if it was sparkledogs i wouldn't ask

you get your pick from:

- apparently universal currency
- kind of sketchy chocolate
- vague unspecified favours
- non-euphemistic incredible luck 24 hours
- as much food and/or alcohol as i can regularly sneak out of the cafeteria*
- a gel pen
- me not breaking into your lab and moving everything in the middle of the night

*offer void if it's on fire

private;

[justabit]

-universal currency
-sketchy chocolate
-vague unspecified favours
-incredible luck if we ever land on a planet with casinos
-as much alcohol as you can fucking carry
-the gel pen

that shit for the flame retardant. deal?

private;

[niffin]

deal. but for the gel pen i expect a drinky bird thrown in

nice doing business with you

private;

[justabit]

whoo boy, you really drive a hard bargain, but fine.

you're lucky i really want that gel pen