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[justabit]

if someone could theoretically make you anything in you could imagine, what would you ask for

"a way back home" or "ways to contact my family" are stupid ideas and off the table. im not a miracle worker im a scientist

i'm not making any weapons for anyone either so dont ask

beyond that its a free-for-all. making no promises that i'll actually take your suggestion to heart unless its a REALLY good idea or you've got a good bribe

otherwise, nothing's too crazy for me to figure out so really dream big here go nuts

Comments

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[ancientwinters]

I want a customisable espresso machine that makes the coffee itself, adds different flavours and does art in the foam. Let's not forget voice command.

But if we are going with anything a maid of some sort would be nice, and he or she should be attractive, intelligent, and skilled in some manner of self defence.

[ He said anything so Loki came up with the most ridiculous things possible.

Coffee and a personal android seem like good options in his opinion. ]

[justabit]

[an espresso machine and a hot maid, huh?]

jesus

if you needed to get laid that badly a simple "im sad and need to get laid" would've sufficed

[ancientwinters]

[ If only he could hear Loki laughing. ]

Where did you get 'sad' and 'sex' from an espresso machine and robot?

Maybe I just like coffee and conversation.

[justabit]

fuck, i'm sorry

i was being insensitive, i had no idea you were capable of being even sadder than i originally thought

[sorry, loki but wanting coffee and conversation just sounds like you're friendless and want someone to just talk to and enjoy mornings with you poor sad sack]

[ancientwinters]

Well you already killed the fun parade by saying you wouldn't make weapons.

I doubt your ideas would be any better.

[ Wow rude, he has friends. They're just not here. Don't judge him. ]

[justabit]

i'd make weapons but if i gave any of you fuckers any ammunition, there's no guarantee i won't wind up dead

my ideas are infinitely times better. you ever heard of a meeseeks? little guys that'll do literally anything you tell them to and will stop and nothing to accomplish their tasks?

extremely helpful when you're having a lazy day or when you don't feel like dealing with annoying... whatever those things are called

humans

[ancientwinters]

We're not all homicidal maniacs.

[ which sort of implies some of them are. oops. ]

How are having meeseeks different from wanting a maid? Same principle without added benefits.

Humans, midgardians, whatever. They're all the same and equally childish at time. What's the name of your planet?

[justabit]

you don't need to be a homicidal maniac to want to shoot an asshole in the gut. i'm a genius, i know a lot of people would pay a lot to see me dead.

meeseeks never die. they can't break down, can't be destroyed. can't be reprogrammed and only listen to the person who have summoned them. you're comparing the two on basic principles, but it's like comparing the entire star wars series to it's shitty, one-off holiday special.

"oh, they're both star wars what the bfd?" the bfd is that the holiday special is bad enough to give children nightmares. it was aired once and wasn't even sold to vhr like, how can you even include that pile of shit to the rest of the series?

anyway, i come from a little place called "n.o.y.b.a"