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[diamondslap]

Hello.
This is Aurelia Hammerlock, Baroness and one of your new Arbitration Officers.
I've only been here for several days, but it's plain to see that all your problems are entirely, completely and obnoxiously boring.

[speaking of obnoxious...]

If you have such a severe lack of common sense that you actually require my services, please ensure that it's for something interesting.
Anything else will be disregarded and most likely laughed at.

Comments

[warandpeace]

Were you allowed to bring any weapons I could have a look at?

[diamondslap]

No.
You shan't be laying a hand on my guns.
Just imagine the most perfectly calibrated and decorated ones you possibly can.
Mine are better.

[warandpeace]

Fair enough. [He's not really offended by that. After all, weapons are pretty important here.]

And how are you at working from scratch?

[diamondslap]

I'm fabulous at survival, and that's practically all survival is.