Text

[whosthemonsternow]

> Alright so
> I know some of you have dinosaur babies
> and I have a mighty need for some dino teeth
> sharper the better
> DON'T PULL THEM OUT MY GOD just ones that fall out on their own
> if you hurt a dinosaur I'll find you and you'll very very much regret it
> Anyways. 
> Dono how much I need
> As much as possible? 
> Can trade physical labor
> like moving shit or something
> Don't really have many items right now but
> i'll work a half hour a tooth 
> also any shaving cream or conditioner 
> or even baby oil idfk
> hit me up

Comments

text; i'm so sorry for nate

[sketchycharacter]

>why do you type like this
>it seems really unnecessary
>yeah sure i'll keep an eye out though
>my dino's teeth look pretty healthy though
>also sharp

rood, i love it but south's a butt :P

[whosthemonsternow]

>suck a fuck, dick hole
>it's the input setting i set on my tab
>and don't pull them out or anything i swear to god
>just keep an eye out for any that plop out on their own
>like puppy teeth

[sketchycharacter]

[Yeah, fuck manually typing that out to make a point.]

despite what people say i'm not dumb enough to stick my hand in a toothy maw
why do you want them anyway

[whosthemonsternow]

>don't know anyone who's said you were dumb
>but i don't think i'd argue
>but only because i'm that nice of a person not to argue
>and i need them for very, very important reasons
>unless you somehow have razor blades or a vary sharp knife

[sketchycharacter]

uh-huh i can tell you're very nice
are you trying to make a shiv?
it sounds like you're trying to make a shiv

[whosthemonsternow]

>when you can punch someone's face off their body
>you don't need to make a shiv
>however I can't punch peoples beards off without hurting them
>so
>i'm trying to shave beards okay jesus christ man
>it's not a puzzle

[sketchycharacter]

no, no
go on
i want to hear more about the beard-punching

[He knows she's just talking shit, but the mental image is amusing and they don't have a lot of opportunities for levity here.]

[whosthemonsternow]

>You want I can give you a first hand demonstration
>just bring a stubble chin here and I'll show you
> :)

[sketchycharacter]

nah i've been punched too many times already
with or without beard
turns out there's a lifetime limit on that

text;

[brokeassgoing]

youre not gonna make those shitty shark tooth necklaces outta them are you
dino tooth
i got some conditioner leftover tho

Re: text;

[whosthemonsternow]

>No I'm not making a necklace
>as awesome as that would be holy fuck
>i need to shave some wild yetis

[brokeassgoing]

i bet a buncha dumbasses would buy some of those necklaces for a pretty penny
uh alright if you wanna call your legs that thats....your call

[whosthemonsternow]

>...that's an idea for another time
>IT'S NOT MY LEGS YOU GIANT COCK GOBBLER
>my brother and my... maine. friend. whatnot
>are too hairy to be human anymore
>i need something to get rid of the hair before i got at their faces with sharp rocks

[brokeassgoing]

youre gonna manscape your bro and friend? brave aintcha

[whosthemonsternow]

>nah it's not brave
>they're hairy and it has to be removed
>it's mutual

[brokeassgoing]

cant get your hands on nair? put em in a tub of it and just walk away? lotta work

[whosthemonsternow]

>that sounds bad for genital areas
>and if there was nair here I'd just slather that on them
>i can't even find a sharp knife
>thus dino teeth
>DO YOU HAVE NAIR OR DINO TEETH OR A SHARP KNIFE

[yondu]

[Is she going to use dino teeth for arrowheads? If so, A+ improvising. It's better than the Caveman Yondu shit he's been pulling.]

You should use a coffee cup and soap and a brush. Pulls off the same effect as shaving cream. Close enough, anyway.

[whosthemonsternow]

[Blue. It's the first thing her mind blurts out- at least just to herself. She doesn't say it out loud or into the video or anything. She just. Nods a little. Okay. Got this. Got this. Don't mention the b l u e]

I was gonna just throw some conditioner on the guys' faces and shave the mess off, it works for my legs in a pinch but- would soap be better?

[BLUE]

[yondu]

Might as well. As long as it's all sudded up. [Wait, is there a stubble burn issue happening here or something?]

...Why you doin' it anyway? I don't figure gettin' all fuzzy's gonna be a huge problem for nobody so long as we're stuck here.

[Hey, he's a happy member of a club of... three... whole blue people... he guesses.]

[whosthemonsternow]

Cause my brother looks like an albino bigfoot and my- ... teammate is literally turning into Wolfman and it's not okay. Plus it's itchy and gross, steel wool, okay, not even hair anymore.

[She rambles, because it's not the word blue and she's behaving. Look at her, not making problems. Even if. Blue.

So blue.]

Unless you got razors or a sharp knife that didn't get taken when were put here...?

[yondu]

I reckon they just cared about us bein' able to do more than your average everyday workhorse. There's still some knives 'n' shit around. Construction stuff.

I mean, they didn't cap my teeth or nothin'.

[He bares his fangs briefly. Just long enough to flash a half-metal grin.]

[whosthemonsternow]

You do that yourself or is that, like...self...grown?

[She wants to ask if he's an alien- well, obviously he's...not human? But she's so wildly curious now and fighting the urge to ask about the blue, and the red, and the teeth, and everything. She still wants to work on getting material to shave the guys but. Must carefully ask questions. Must be nice. Must. Behave.]

[yondu]

Yeah, they just kinda come natural. I'm a Centaurian, if that's what your wanderin'.

[He can at least tell that she's dodging some anatomy question specifics there.]

I got a few of 'em replaced after a few accidents. [Fights.] But other'n that what you see is how they settled.

Are you Terran or Xandarian?

[whosthemonsternow]

[She's not sure what a Centaurian is, or an Xandarian for that matter. But Terran is definitely Earth so she's at least not totally lost here.]

Uh, neither? Well? I guess Terran? Okay, I'm from a UNSC planet that people colonization from Earth, so.