video post

[otiosity]

Alright shipmates. I have a very important and deeply philosophical question to ask all of you. It may change your life and rock you to your very core.

[Serious Hawke isn't all that good at being serious. So don't be bad if you assume, just a little bit, that this is a shitpost. Hawke clears her throat dramatically before continuing.]

Let's say you you receive an item. Something like a book or... a computer... read-y thing. And within it's pages it details the future of your life exactly as someone you know experienced it.

Would you read it? Only read the parts that are your past? Or just toss the whole bloody pile of them out garbage chute? Is there any right answer? Is it more dangerous to know your future or to experience it blindly? Questions! Thinky-thoughts! Deep ones.

Which leads me to-

[Hawke shows to the camera a large leather bound book entitled Tale of the Champion and decorated with the Kirkwall City Crest on it. Behind her there are a stack of at least 10 similar books.]

If you would like a copy of the apparently popular book by the somehow incredibly popular author, Varric Tehras, you can hit me up. Look, it's even autographed. Bet that's worth a coin or two. Maybe I'll even sign it so it's double famous. Or perhaps infamous. Which is maybe why the Ingress decided I needed 20 of them.

[She's not gonna sign it. Honestly, she finds this whole thing jacked! But also funny and curious and that's a lot of feelings all at once for Marian Hawke.

Then she reaches down onto the pile of books and pulls out an extremely cute and lace covered bra.]

I'm also giving away this thing for anyone who desperately wants to have the most beautiful bosom on the ship. Sadly, I just don't have the heart to suffer for beauty. I'm a born and true ruffian at heart. Size 32AA.

((ooc; "Tale of the Champion" details the events of Dragon Age II which you can read the short version or the long version of the summary if you want to get a copy/assume you were given a copy by Hawke and ask her questions about it. I'm also open at bowtie or PM if you wanna ask specific questions))

Comments

[orplasmic]

Sounds kinda nuts. How do you even know if it's real or not? If the big hole in the universe is an asshole maybe it made everything up.

[otiosity]

Well. It's real up to where I'm at. And Varric always said he wanted to write a book about me. I was "real protagonist material" apparently.

[orplasmic]

Is that a nice way of sayin' you get into trouble a lot?

[otiosity]

Exactly on point.

[orplasmic]

That what it sounded like. I'd say I'd take a copy but I ain't much of a reader most of the time.

[otiosity]

Oh, there's plenty to go around.

Or just steal someone else's.

[orplasmic]

Actually, I might grab one the library. Elizabeth, the librarian, would probably want one.

[ And it'll give him an excuse to talk to her after what he saw in the tear the other day. ]

[otiosity]

A book about me in the library?

Now that's real fame.