video

[diamondslap]

My goodness. I haven't been gone for all that long and suddenly there's even  more of you buggers.

[a+ intro as always. at least she hasn't threatened to kill anyone this time?]

Lady Aurelia Hammerlock, darlings. Arbitration officer. Feel free to come to me with any of your problems and I shall hand out free advice. Or a gun - I play it case by case.

[...welp.]

Oh, and J. Darling. It's only a little bit personal but I have to sucker punch you in the throat. I'm sure you understand.

locked to all arbitration officers

Bitch is baaaack! [she says in an obnoxious sing song voice.] Come, come, do introduce yourselves to me. Or give me an update of the last month or so. Oh, goodness! I do hope something interesting has happened. 

locked to tarn

How marvelous to see you still on the crew list, darling!

[genuine delight to see tarn. must be a first.]

We must have a catch up, how about the simulation deck at lunch? Is it still around? There's nothing like a date while sniping.

Comments

[petridish]

[what is this feeling........]

Yeah, I was in there last month. I think you went in when I got out.

You missed a good time with crew ending up on a slaver outpost. Could've used your eye.

[diamondslap]

Bugger.
Wouldn't have been the first slaver outpost I've shot into either.
Ah, c'est la vie.
They're not all that rare.

[petridish]

You might get another chance. Apparently this is a shitty part of the universe.

Would've preferred shooting in with you. We had to go stealth so they wouldn't turn their slaving sights on the Moira.

[diamondslap]

I'm flattered, darling.
When we inevitably happen across the next human safari you'll be the first one I call.

[petridish]

Thanks.

It wasn't just a human safari, though. I actually had to go down there to rescue an alien I know from home, because she's Chief Engineer.

And now more aliens from home have turned up.

[diamondslap]

How annoying. Are they all as dull as the others here?

[petridish]

You know it. If I had to get more people from home here, they could have at least been human.

[diamondslap]

What sort of humans do you know?

[petridish]

[The woman who taught her everything she knows only to betray her, and mercenaries.]

Soldiers. No family, not for a long time.

What about you?

[diamondslap]

Fools.
I knew maybe 3 or 4 interesting ones out of the 20 I've met in the last month.

[petridish]

Great, there are idiots in every universe.

[diamondslap]

Unavoidable fact of life, I'm afraid.
Rise above, darling.
Rise above.

[petridish]

I'm trying to. Feels like I keep getting dragged back down with them.

[diamondslap]

I'd say try harder but honestly in your case I think a good backhand might solve your problems.

[petridish]

Ha. A good backhand wouldn't get me kicked off the ship like a murder attempt, either. Would you believe someone thought I'd try to kill the other Shepard? (The one that looks like me, because now there's another one.)

[diamondslap]

That is why a good backhand is the solution to everything, darling.
Another one? My heavens.
I doubt she's as astute.

[petridish]

I'll keep that in mind.

I haven't talked to the new one much but the least I'm hoping for is that she's a little more astute than the other redhead.

[diamondslap]

How many of you can there possibly be?
We'll be seeing a male incarnation show up next, I'll bet.

[petridish]

One per universe, I guess. I miss being the only one.

Seeing a male me would be even weirder.