text; + action options

[sketchycharacter]

[The following is actually a series of three separate posts to the network; all three are posted in fairly quick succession, likely before anyone can reply to the first two, though they are open to comments.]

how do you make it so not everyone can read one of these things

[like thirty seconds later]

oh

[a couple of minutes later LOCKED FROM CERTAIN PEOPLE NAMED ELENA FISHER]

so a bunch of people use this system to pour their hearts out and get other people to do the same which usually seems weird to me. i mean just because you say it over the mid doesn't mean you won't run into people later and make it really weird and awkward. i don't know maybe that's just me.

except what the hell i'm pretty drunk right now so why the fuck not!

RIDDLE ME THIS, CREWMATES. pretend for a minute that you're a complete asshole who somehow got the most amazing woman in the world to marry you, fucked it up real fast like dropped a grenade on it bad BECAUSE you're a complete asshole, got her to take you back and start over and then fucked it up again.

what do you do? asking for a friend.

also the first person to make a suggestion that actually works can have some of my alcohol stash. everyone else can fuck off i'm not sharing.

[action options - feel free to go from a network thread to one of these]

[OPTION 1: DRUNK. Nate is pretty toasted as he wanders around the ship, but not so much than he has trouble getting around with just an occasional stumble. Alcohol tends to loosen his lips, so he'll gladly (well, not he's not real glad about anything right now) talk to anyone who makes the poor life decision to talk to him first.

[OPTION 2: DRUNKER. Jeez, he's getting to be a real mess now. Nate makes a trip to where the Mess Hall used to be so he can pour one out in honor of the lost bar. What a hideous waste of alcohol. Afterward, he visits the observation deck to drunkenly look at the stars, and will stay there.

[OPTION 3: DRUNKEST. Oh god he's so unhappy. Look at this complete wreck of a man who's making the observation deck a pretty unpleasant place to be. He is completely wasted. (Existing CR only for this option please—basically, if they've had at least one conversation, you're good.)]

Comments

[chipouttaluck]

hell if i know.
could be any kinda boat, i reckon.
advice is really hard to do when you're sober and there's not some kinda Thing you can do about it.
talkin' seems to work for some folks, though.

i am blessed

[arcreact]

Okay, wait, hang on.

Is this a "she read my diary and didn't tell me" situation?

[sketchycharacter]

was a total asshole can't you read
i mean if you want a comprehensive list maybe make some popcorn first it'll take a while

[sketchycharacter]

looks like!

uh i'd like to be completely smashed but don't worry i'm working on it.

[sonywalkman]

you left her

HOW ARE YOU MARRIED?

[sketchycharacter]

[That gets a few seconds of mildly hysterical chuckles.]

Oh hell no. This was written before I was even born. She just didn't like the contents. Sir Francis Drake is a delicate subject in our house.

[keelahselai]

there's a lot of subcategories to being an asshole. the kind you're being right now is probably different to the kind your friend was

I don't know what popcorn is, but pretend I made some already. shoot.

[gentlemenpreferblondes]

charming

i was talking about what you want with that lady but hey
that sounds great too

[otiosity]

thats true! maybe youll get to the level where you can shave it off as a joke.

oh well don't worry i've been told i could sleep through a high dragon ransacking the city so i wouldnt have noticed anyway.

are we moving up or down on the awkward scale i cant tell.

[sketchycharacter]

i have asked this myself damn near every day since

[sonywalkman]

dude no really how do you stay married if you leave

that's called divorce

nate what the fuck

[sketchycharacter]

that's the sort of joke that ends in my brutal murder. i haven't known dorian that long but i know that much is true.

oh good because she can get pretty loud sometimes when i'm trying hard.

uhhhh i don't know it depends how alcohol affects the scale because i'll be honest with you: i've had a lot.

[arcreact]

[ Well, with the last name "Drake"... ]

Daddy issues, then. Or maybe idol worship issues.

—Oh god. Is it both? Both is a deadly combo.

[sketchycharacter]

My father abandoned me to the state when I was four, so naaaaah. Sir Francis has also been dead for centuries, so—ancestor issues. Maybe.

[Maybe the issues/maybe an ancestor.]

[sketchycharacter]

i want to grow old with her but that's probably longer-term than i can afford to think right now

[sketchycharacter]

good point
wait hold up forget my issues
why don't you know what popcorn is

[sketchycharacter]

i don't think talking will do much for me
things get worse when i talk
shutting up might keep things from getting worse but then it wouldn't make them better either

[keelahselai]

I'm an alien, remember?
...you're drunk, maybe you don't remember. well, I'm an alien. We don't have your weird human rituals

[otiosity]

darn i was hoping someone could take the fall. at least he could revive your corpse and

NO OK. OKAY. maker that is too much. she doesn't deserve her weird roommate with the annoying dog knowing those details, i'm sure. it wasn't a challenge it was supposed to be a comfort so i can understand her sad looks and give her a knowing glance.

personally it negates my perception of awkward entirely. and i think youre getting there too. congrats.

do you need help getting off the floor?

[chipouttaluck]

well then we gotta try something that's not talking.
maybe a present or somethin?
that's all i've got.

[sketchycharacter]

i just walked out, i didn't file papers

and neither did she

so we were just sort of estranged for months. got back together a little before i was space kidnapped except she hasn't experienced that yet

[sketchycharacter]

oh well you should have said something. i don't think that would really help anyway. wait is she having a lot of sad looks?

no. i like the floor i think i'll stay here.

[sketchycharacter]

i'm open to suggestions
but i'm not sure what present could possibly help here
maybe a diamond the size of a basketball but she's not materialistic

[sketchycharacter]

it's POPCORN. that should be a universal constant.

[chipouttaluck]

figure out what kinda stuff they like and then get that. i dunno what that stuff'd be though.