audio; a very important statement for the entire crew

[skelepun]

[Solemn silence reigns for the first few moments of the broadcast. A shuffle of papers, a clearing of his throat -- or technically, a very good impersonation of it. There's no throat to clear. Anyway.]

Okay, so. I know there's been a lot of back and forth lately, kids. And I don't wanna add to the tension, but as long as we're ripping off band aids? I figure there's no time like the present.

[Another deep breath. Clearly, this is weighing heavily on the guy.]

I'm gonna say a few words that'll mean a lot to you guys. Bran. Oatmeal. Raisins. Words that should never even brush against the word muffin. And yet every Saturday, seems like those are the only muffins I see. I'm not gonna point fingers or anything. I dunno if the blame lies with the people taking the decent pastries or the persons allowing those ingredients to infect perfectly good muffins in the first place, but it's a tragic miscarriage of judgment and for the safety of the crew, I think it's important we all address the massive, raisin dotted elephant in the room.

I'm mean, jeez, guys. There are kids on this ship. What if they mistake them for chocolate chips? We're all responsible if we do nothing. Get it together, Moira.

[Another deep breath. He's said his peace. When he speaks again, it's as if a completely different person is grinning into the mic.]

And hey, as long as we're all here, feel free to air your various grievances too. Y'know, to save the Captains their bandwidth. Let it all out.

Comments

text;

[forfeits]

You don't need to be tall to be strong, anyway. Whoever says differently needs a real kick in the ass! Milk is disgusting. Who needs it, anyway.

My brother's pretty tall, too. He's the only person I can't beat in a fight. So I guess we're kind of similar. You'd never guess he'd be that tough, though. I caught him sneaking kittens around in his armour once.

text;

[skelepun]

haha holy shit. are we secretly related. sounds exactly like my bro.

does yours wear a rad scarf? 'cuz if not, i'm pretty sure mine wins.

text;

[forfeits]

Probably not, we look pretty different!

My little brother wears a suit of armour though, and a loin cloth I guess. Alphonse is pretty great, though, so I think mine wins instead.

text;

[skelepun]

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm yeah, nah.

i'm sure you're little bro's great and all, but.

my little bro can solve a rubix cube in like, five minutes. give or take a few hours.

sooooooooo

text;

[forfeits]

We'll just see about that. Get our brother's together and see who is the best. I'm telling you, I'm still going to win. Al's pretty great.

My little brother could make this whole ship into a rubix cube probably if he tried hard enough.

[ fite him. ]

text;

[skelepun]

[oh it's on son]

well if he did, my bro could probably solve it, rescramble it, and drive it all the way to where ever the captains have us going with his magic alone.

i mean, y'know. just sayin'.

[forfeits]

Your brother sounds pretty great and all, but I still don't think he could beat Al. We could probably get this ship moving with alchemy alone, too, you know.

Maybe even lock your brother up in a cage even magic can't escape! I guess we're pretty lucky we have them, huh?

[skelepun]

hehe make that cage crack again and we're gonna have a problem lol.

[Y'know? Laughing out loud? Obviously it's a joke. Obviously.]

but you ain't wrong, kid. kid brothers are the best. like having a built in receiving end for dumb pranks.

[forfeits]

What does 'lol' mean? Is that some space word?

[ No, really, serious question here. He might be taking notes, okay. ]

Brothers are pretty great. Al's pretty good at pranks, but he's mostly the best at hiding kittens and bringing them home.

[skelepun]

yeah, i picked it up after moving here. it's a polite way to end a sentence with someone you respect. like...

"hey, dr. banner, have you been working out? lol"

i'd use it more often but, well, i'm not a very polite person y'see.

[forfeits]

Really? I didn't know that. lol.

Is that right? Just type lol after sentences lol.

That looks pretty weird.

[skelepun]

every change looks weird at first, but you'll get used to it. i mean, you'll have to, if you want to communicate intelligently with the higher-ups aboard the ship.

captains especially. i once saw someone talk to curre without the formal lol... very embarrassing for 'em.

[forfeits]

Wow, okay I'll definitely use the formal lol next time. I don't want to make any of them mad. They're quiet enough anyway. Do you say it when you talk out loud, too?

How do you pronounce it? Pretty weird word. I swear there are more rules on this ship than there are in alchemy. lol.

[skelepun]

repeat after me: lawwwwwwwl.

the more respectful, the longer you stretch it out.

what is this thread.

[forfeits]

That sounds weird out loud. So if I was talking to one of the captains or something it would have to be like lawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwl. Extra long?

the worst thing

[skelepun]

see? you're already an expert.

just the best.

[forfeits]

I don't know it feels pretty strange. You're sure that's something they do here? I've never heard it before.

[skelepun]

100% positive.