audio; a very important statement for the entire crew

[skelepun]

[Solemn silence reigns for the first few moments of the broadcast. A shuffle of papers, a clearing of his throat -- or technically, a very good impersonation of it. There's no throat to clear. Anyway.]

Okay, so. I know there's been a lot of back and forth lately, kids. And I don't wanna add to the tension, but as long as we're ripping off band aids? I figure there's no time like the present.

[Another deep breath. Clearly, this is weighing heavily on the guy.]

I'm gonna say a few words that'll mean a lot to you guys. Bran. Oatmeal. Raisins. Words that should never even brush against the word muffin. And yet every Saturday, seems like those are the only muffins I see. I'm not gonna point fingers or anything. I dunno if the blame lies with the people taking the decent pastries or the persons allowing those ingredients to infect perfectly good muffins in the first place, but it's a tragic miscarriage of judgment and for the safety of the crew, I think it's important we all address the massive, raisin dotted elephant in the room.

I'm mean, jeez, guys. There are kids on this ship. What if they mistake them for chocolate chips? We're all responsible if we do nothing. Get it together, Moira.

[Another deep breath. He's said his peace. When he speaks again, it's as if a completely different person is grinning into the mic.]

And hey, as long as we're all here, feel free to air your various grievances too. Y'know, to save the Captains their bandwidth. Let it all out.

Comments

audio

[springlocking]

[It's true, but Charlie will be kind enough not to say it.]

Rules like...getting assigned a job you have no idea how to pull off? Things like that?

[What even IS a stealth operations thingy. 8(]

text;

[skelepun]

uh oh, kiddo. what've they got you doin'?

audio

[springlocking]

Something called "stealth operative".

[There's a hmph of annoyance.]

Honestly, this "get all raisins off the ship" thing makes more sense.

Also - seventeen, not a kid.

[THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT OKAY.]

text;

[skelepun]

seventeen. even more of a kid than i realized.

[Sorry Charlie, thems the breaks.]

do much stealth operating in your past life?

audio

[springlocking]

Are - are you being serious with that or joking?

[She's still getting used to this arcane "text message" thing.]

No, I was just a student back home. Maybe I should go ask around...

audio

[skelepun]

a student? of what?

audio

[springlocking]

[...????]

High school...?

[Oh, right, talking skeleton!!]

If you're under eighteen where I'm from, you've gotta be in school. There's a system set up to make sure that's the case. [Pause.] Actually, people are encouraged to stay in school until age twenty-one, but not everyone does.

[skelepun]

hehe, we have school where i'm from, kid. didn't realize you were under eighteen... sorry to be the bearer of bad news (or good news, if you're a nerd like me), but there's probably gonna be a certain old lady after you to attend classes around here too.

the teaching staff's pretty cool, though. especially the substitutes.

[springlocking]

[So much for summer break...]

Oh, they are? That's a relief. Maybe it'll be okay then.

[Teacher coolness is kind of a gamble, okay.]

[skelepun]

that's the spirit, kiddo.