Video:

[ersatzeverything]

[Deacon has the wig on today and sunglasses (finally got a pair thanks to the Ingress) and a black suit that was probably once very sharp but after two hundred years and a nuclear apocalypse is very much the worse for wear.]

Hey, science-y people, anyone have experience with laser guns?


[Locked to Medbay Staff]

So, totally hypothetically, if someone wanted to completely change their face, could you do it?

[He should try to hang on to the face he's got for another six months at least, but he wants to know what his options are. And wants to know whether or not he has options.]

Comments

Re: video

[ersatzeverything]

Your place must have different laser guns than mine. Or else a totally different atmosphere. [With all the aliens running around here, you never know.] You'd have to modify mine in a pretty particular way to set people on fire with it. And...I think I'm happy having my gun not do that, thanks.

Re: video

[diamondslap]

Really? Is that a joke? You didn't say it like you were joking. Were you joking?

[he... doesn't want to set people on fire?]

[ersatzeverything]

I do a lot of running around tunnels and fires in enclosed spaces is not fun. For one thing, it takes ages to get the smell of smoke out of your hair, you know. [Deacon, you don't have any hair. You shave it off.]

[diamondslap]

Not if you use the right product. I believe Tediore have a line of shampoo and cleaner for getting the stench of burned flesh out of your hair and clothes.

[aurelia just buys new clothes and uses top of the line rich people product, but you know.]

[ersatzeverything]

Yeah, funny enough I have a hard time finding luxury designer shampoo in the wasteland. I've gotta go file a complaint with the local store managers when I get back.

[The fact that Aurelia has a fast answer to the question of "how to get the smell of burnt flesh out of your hair" is disturbing.]

[diamondslap]

Wasteland? What planet have you been on, darling?

[if he says pandora she's gonna shoot him in the leg because honestly fuck pandora and its moon.]

[ersatzeverything]

[It's so weird being in a place where there's more than one possible answer to that question. He'd be tempted to lie but he doesn't know enough about other planets yet to make a proper go at it.]

Earth. It used to be a nice place, but the property values have really gone downhill in the last couple centuries.

[diamondslap]

With a name like dirt, who's surprised? I expect you've moved off-planet, if you know of laser guns. They haven't made their debut planet side, as far as I'm aware.

[ersatzeverything]

Yeah, I was a space adventurer for a while. I got myself a space car and travelled around the galaxy righting wrongs, shooting evil space aliens, that sort of thing. It was awesome, but I had to go back to Earth and help overthrow a dictator. Finished that and I was just about to take off again when the Ingress picked me up.

[He's trying out a whole new level of sheer outrageousness in lying now, seeing how much being on an alien spaceship will let him get away with.]

[diamondslap]

[JUST THIS FACE, DEACON.]

[ersatzeverything]

[Okay, maybe that was too much. Now he knows.]

All right, all right, I'm not a space adventurer. I was a town mayor. And when you're mayor of a rough place like Goodneighbor, you want to pack some decent firepower on you.

[diamondslap]

Goodneighbour? Sounds like a place that's either crawling with degenerates or armed guards. Possibly both. Certainly neither.

[nice names are never nice, aurelia's found.]

[ersatzeverything]

Crawling with degenerates is pretty accurate, yeah. I mean, they let me be mayor, so that's gotta tell you something right there, right? [Said cheerfully.]

[diamondslap]

It says more than you can imagine. I almost feel pity for them.

[ersatzeverything]

Oo, burn.

Has anyone ever told you that grey hair ages you? You might want to get that stripe dyed. Just saying.

[If they're going to start trading insults...]

[diamondslap]

Darling, before you continue, let me just put one fact on the table: commenting on a lady's age is a crime punishable by being shot, on my home planet. Not to mention utterly oafish.

[and, also, aurelia just likes shooting people.]

[ersatzeverything]

Wow, that's quick on the capital punishment. Talk about draconian.

[He tilts his head.]

But, yeah, I'll agree to it being oafish.

[diamondslap]

Darling, when you're as rich as I am, you can pretty much murder whoever you want.

[she laughs, briefly.]

How lucky I was to turn out to be cruel enough to abuse that privilege!

[ersatzeverything]

I never thought this was possible, but you're kinda making me glad for the nuclear apocalypse. I mean, we sort of have rich assholes, but with the total collapse of the world economy, we don't really have rich assholes and I never realized how lucky we were for that until now. So thanks for that! You totally made me feel better about my hometown.

[Lots of people still murder whoever they want, but if they do you're basically allowed to murder them back without one law for you and a different law for them.]

[diamondslap]

Glad to hear you facilitate nuclear genocide, darling.

[she loves it when people get all worked up about the shit she says.]