thisavrou | audio; slightly backdated to an ungodly hour of the morning

Good morning.

[ the voice on the other end seems to have a vague Russian accent. ]

Since it seems to be a common theme lately, I have a question for everyone: What is the absolute strangest thing you've ever seen or experienced, either where you come from, or from here?

[ a pause ]

In the interest of good faith, I've got a story to share with you about mine. My first Commanding Officer had the unique ability to shoot electricity out of his hands. He was a real piece of work, [ no that was probably sharing too much ] but that's neither here or there. Anyways... he could shoot electricity out of his hands. Which you might or might not find out of the ordinary, but it wasn't quite the weirdest shit I've ever run up against.

[ but back to the story ] Anyways, he ended up getting killed by an enemy agent, much to the dismay of almost no one. But, even if his brain was gone, somehow his body was kept alive, almost out of sheer spite.

And twenty years later, he woke up. But he was on fire. And that fire... [ a pause as he looks for the right word ] zombie [ that was not the right word ] chased me and this other guy on a flaming unicorn.

And that was the strangest thing I've ever experienced.

[ but instead of it shutting off, his tone changes ever so slightly, as he seems to be talking to a person on the other end. ]

-So as you can see, I'm perfectly...

[ no. now it's shut off. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[It's okay, she's used to being disappointed.]

No kidding, but how. Was it some kind of machine, or natural?

[It could be normal, if his normal consists of splicing his genes by drinking strange concoctions.]

It was natural.

[ you know... that isn't all that far from the truth. ]

Sound like something you're familiar with?

Yeah, a little. Where I'm from, people could drink something and it would rearrange their genes. Make them capable of some pretty... interesting things. Including producing electricity.

People could just rearrange their genes with a drink?

[ wow. ]

I know a couple of people who'd pay for something like that. But back where I'm from, natural abilities like that just showed up. Though, there's some evidence that it might be genetic.

[ since apparently he can also channel spirits like his father. not that he's tried. yet. ]

Well it had to come from somewhere. Research into gene splicing no doubt started with where these abilities naturally occurred and then... [Obvious outcome is obvious, right?] I know people who got rich off of people paying for something like that. Only drawback seems to be that it drives you absolutely insane.

He was one-of-a-kind. But, we did have people looking into what parasites could do, as well as ESP.

[ as for that side effect... well. he almost laughs at that. ]

Seems like a pretty big drawback, if you ask me.

Huh. I suppose I should be glad nobody ever figured out ESP where I'm from. Would have made dealing with the insane-from-power much more difficult.

Oh it only seems like a drawback. Who needs sanity when you can release angry swarms of bees from your hands?

[Such sarcasm from one so young-sounding.]

[ he laughs at that. ]

I actually knew a guy like that too. I don't know if he actually shot the bees from his hands, or just created them. He'd probably have agreed with you.

[ what even is his life? ]

[This is too uncanny-- she has to ask, because even if it's a timeline she's never heard of, maybe there's a chance that it's connected. Somehow.]

Where are you from?

[ who even knows? maybe it was. ]

1984. The Soviet Union.

[ again, facts that others might already know about him should they show up here. ]

audio; slightly backdated to an ungodly hour of the morning

Audio

Audio

Audio

Audio

Audio

Audio

Audio

Audio

Audio

Audio