video - this is stupid

[knaval]

Uh-- is this working? Hello?

[the screen picture is perfectly showing riptide's panicked expression.]

I have absolutely no idea-- uh. My name is Riptide! I was with the crew of the Moira, but now I have no idea where I am. Crazy, right? I think I passed out? I have no idea. Anyway, this is a call for help! I've been approached by people and-- it's awful! I need an extraction immediately!

[he groans dramatically.]

They want me to get a job! [he was recommended to get a job.] A job! Like-- like being employed somewhere! Being paid to have responsibilities! I think one of them even said I can buy a-- a place to live?! I... I need to sit down. I have literally been tortured before and I've never, at this exact moment, been more uncomfortable in my entire life!

Comments

[heisenbitch]

Well, what d'you like doing? Y'know, besides... robot stuff.

[knaval]

I like... piloting stuff. I'm a good pilot.

[heisenbitch]

[ ........ ]

Like, boat pilot? With the whole speedboat thing you can do?

[knaval]

No? I just turn into the boat. I can pilot spaceships. Not big ones like the Moira was, but fighters 'n transports and stuff.

[heisenbitch]

Um... with your holoform, I'm guessing? I mean, I guess, unless they got some kinda jet or whatever here big enough to cram a pilot the size of a building into...

[knaval]

Well... obviously Cybertronians have Cybertronian sized crafts, but I couldn't use my holoform. It has a limited range and if I push too hard it could literally kill me.

[heisenbitch]

Shit. Okay. Well...

Well, I mean, we're in space. Which means anything is possible, right? Unless there's something else you like doing? Gardening? Walking dogs? Painting?

[knaval]

Yeah, I'll figure something out.

[heisenbitch]

[ Does Jesse care about you, you giant dumb robot? You bet. And now he knows Riptide has had one giant, shitty life... Well, it's fucking weird caring about a robot, but Riptide has been pretty good to Jesse. He lets out a quiet sigh, lips pressed into a crooked, contemplative line while studying Riptide's giant dumb robot face. ]

Hey, look, man, it'll be okay. You've made it this far, right? Four million years? Of what sounds like a massively shit situation? Means you'll get through this, too, yeah? Something'll work itself out.

[knaval]

I know, I know. I appreciate what you're saying, it's just...

[he doesn't think a human could comprehend the amount of time he has to deal with.]

What are you doing?

[heisenbitch]

[ Jesse can in no way comprehend the amount of time Riptide has to deal with. He's trying his best to be a bro, though. ]

Uhh, as in, what am I doing right now? Or what am I doing as in, why am I tryna help out? [ A beat, then: ] I can come hang out if you want company, if that's what you're askin'.

[knaval]

I meant like, in general, but I actually wouldn't mind the company.

[he appreciates it, small man.]

[heisenbitch]

Just tell me where to head, yo.

[knaval]

Kauto, that... area 1 thing. Look for the giant spaceship that looks like Rodimus's face. The stupid thing survived so I'm gonna stay in it for a while.