thisavrou | Video; Episode 1: the one where swerve gets space bridged

[The camera is shakey as Swerve tries to get the hang of using it on his wrist, squinting at it through his visor as it clicks on before a small whirring beep sounds off as he realises it's online.]

Eyy! Brilliant! Got this thing working. [he's going to finger guns at the camera with his spare hand] So, hey there crew of the Moira, aka Swearth 2: Return of the emotional trauma! Quester, bartender, and all round awesome guy Swerve at your service. Gotta say, this ship is kinda smaller than the Lost Light--your hallways could use some expanding for us taller guys. I mean, not for me, but you know. Other guys. There are other guys here right? [he waves his hand dismissively, seeming to drift off for a few moments.]

Anyway, off topic, I know. But it's been a while since I've had a captive audience, let alone one with so many organics! I've seen dozens of you squishy buggers! You're everywhere! And that's so cool! I gotta get my holo up and running so I can be one with you.

So, two main things I wanna know:

One, where's the nearest alcoholic establishment, a guy could really use a stiff glass of high grade right about now, and two--or, actually, well this kinda is part of one, since I need to know if you people even know what high grade is or how to distill it and last time this happened I was sort of human so I didn't even need to fuel up with energon, I just ate a fragton of pizza and drank good ol' fashioned beer in a can which was a weird but awesome experience, I can tell you that. Wait, where was I going with this again?

Oh! Right! Energon. You lot know what it is, or am I gonna starve slowly and painfully? And without even getting overcharged. That would be an awful way to go, nobody should have to live out their last moments in life without getting completely wankered. Not that I intend on dying, but you know. You never know what's around the next quantum jump!

[he starts getting distracted, looking off screen at something, and mutters to himself:] Slag, Quantum Leap--do I even still have that data slug on me? Gotta finish that episode before I forge--

[the recording abruptly shuts off as he slips his fingers over the device.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

...I don't know what 'high grade energon' is, but I'd be willing to take my chances.

There isn't a drink around that can mess me up!

[Darin, no.]

[HUMAN NO]

No, I mean seriously. It'll rip out your insides. It's made for cybertronians, not organic life forms. Especially if you're not hardcore like me.

What?! You don't even know the meaning of the word 'hardcore!' I can totally handle that stuff!!

[WHY WOULD YOU EGG HIM ON]

[BECAUSE IT'S KINDA FUNNY.]

I bet you couldn't even beat me--a non-combatant--in an arm wrestling match!

YOU'RE ON!! I'LL TAKE YOU ON ANYTIME, ANYWHERE!!

Name the time and place, Squishy!

Name's Darin! Not Squishy!

And let's see...you guys are gigantic so...we need a lot of space.

Observation Deck?

Alright, Darin. Prepare to lose at arm wrestling. I'm mostly arm.

And I think you need to prepare to be surprised.

You're gonna eat those words, little man. [it's not threatening, if anything he's just amused with how this is going to go. The video cuts out after that, and Swerve makes his way over to the Observation Deck to wait for the little guy. A distraction like this is exactly what he needs.]

[Darin makes his way to the observation deck quickly enough, and when he saunters up to Swerve, he gives the bot a once over.]

Huh, you're not nearly as big as some of the other giant space golems around here.

Video; Episode 1: the one where swerve gets space bridged

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video -> action??

ACTION