text

[knaval]

hi there!! my name is riptide and some of you might now me as the guy who got punched in the face by magnus a couple of weeks ago
i haven't been out much recently but i guess there's a load of new people!! hi!! again!!! i'm one of the giant metal guys
i turn into a boat and yes i will totally show you if you want
and also, yes, i am aware of the irony of being a water vehicle in space
its been three million years, i've heard all the jokes OKAY

ANYWAY... i come to you all asking a favour
i have to do something for someone but i'm missing some key artefacts with which to complete this
i need:

-plastic wings. big ones please
-the entire collection of enya and sinead o'connor
-a strong chain
-super glue

if anyone has any of those or some ideas for substitutes, let me know!! :)

Comments

[squadgoals]

Why not just send them cards in the mail addressed from each other or something like that??

[She's back on her desk, cup over a spider.]

[knaval]

go hard or go home
and we can't go home SO

[squadgoals]

[Spider successfully caught, she's walking with it to Riptide's room, typing.]

Why can't "go hard" just equate to locking them in a large hall closet for seven minutes in heaven, or something?

[After hitting send, she pauses, frowning at herself. Why was she making worse recommendations????]

[knaval]

seven minutes??
weak
we do SEVEN YEARS

[squadgoals]

What???

No you don't.

I'll believe a lot of things, but the buck stops there.

[knaval]

its okay i understand a human couldnt comprehend it

[squadgoals]

I dare you to lock yourself in a closet with Sideswipe for 7 human years.

[squadgoals]

Starting now.

[knaval]

no we already ate face today gosh

[squadgoals]

Is 7 years too much of a commitment?

[knaval]

no i just can't be bothered

[squadgoals]

Now, now. You can be honest with me, Riptide.

[knaval]

I AM BEING HONEST

[squadgoals]

I've got it: there's usually spiders in closets.

[knaval]

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