video ★ 002

[sidecars]

[ After several informative talks about modern contraception from his roommates and down in Medbay, Bucky can't keep all of this brand new knowledge to himself! No sir! He has wisely chosen to use the public network to proclaim his discoveries. Enjoy. ]

Why have I only just learned about flavored condoms?!

[ Seriously, guys. Shame on you. Also someone take his MID privileges away from him. ]

Comments

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[foggybear]

How old are you, exactly?

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[sidecars]

Old enough

[ to kick your ass! Don't be rude, Foggy. ]

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[foggybear]

Where I come from that pretty much guarantees you're like 14.

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[sidecars]

Well where I come from
I'm a decorated war vet
So maybe you should be less judgy

[ If he can't play the orphan card, he plays the soldier card. Bucky has no shame. ]

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[foggybear]

[ He's a lawyer and has to remain nice and mediator-ish. This his job. He'll shove the million jokes he has out of his mind and focus on the question, but it's hard, man. ]

I'm not judging, that's not my job. You just raised about a million questions, though. How are you old enough to fight but not know about strawberry lube and banana condoms and all that?

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[sidecars]

I'm from that one war
The one with ol' Uncle Adolf
Know it?

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[foggybear]

Oh


are you referring to world war ii?
You know Captain America's here right????

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[sidecars]

Captain America's here??
Gosh I better get his autograph!

[ James "Asshole" Barnes. ]

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[foggybear]

I know!

I was pretty stoked.

He saved New York in the future, you know. Just punched aliens right in the face.

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[sidecars]

Golly, he sure is something

I've worked with him a few times in the War
Nothing major, but
Sometimes he need reinforcements
He is super swell that guy!

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[foggybear]

Do you guys really use golly and swell?
I thought that was just the movies.

Actually wait, did you refer to radios as talkies or is that just my crazy aunt?

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[sidecars]

Cheese and crackers, we sure do!
I say swell a lot!
It's the hottest word around in my time

Hmm and your aunt might be crazy I can't say for sure

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[foggybear]

I never want to live in the 40s.

Most Nelsons by default are a little loose on the brain juice it's true. We make up for it with kickass pastrami sandwiches, though.
Seriously cap is like 50 and still punching aliens in the face.
He fought a God once

It was awesome.

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[sidecars]

Wow what a stellar guy that Cap!

[ Bucky is eye rolling so hard right now. He's fought a god too, you know? Big thunder god, really Norse? Sure, Bucky might have died and the timeline had to be re-written, but the point is he still fought one!! ]

But you know that Bucky Barnes isn't bad either!
Pretty sure Cap would have been toast a few times without him and his tommy gun!

text; im sorry

[foggybear]

Who?

text; oh my god ihy

[sidecars]

Bucky Barnes
You know
His PARTNER
Swell sniper
Has a fantastic smile

He doesn't have all that fancy super soldier strength
Just an average Joe getting it done

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[foggybear]

Isn't he his brother or something?

I haven't been to the museum in a while

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[sidecars]

Well sort of, but

Wait what museum?

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[foggybear]

The Smithsonian????

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[sidecars]

Holy moley!
That's actually pretty grand

Good for Cap

[ And he does mean that. Steve needs all the adoration his country can give him after the sacrifices he made for their freedom. ]

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[foggybear]

It's a pretty sweet set-up.

There's stuff about the others, though. Howling Commandos?

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[sidecars]

That's good
We worked plenty with them

text; 2/2

[sidecars]

I mean
They
Obviously
I'm still not very good at this "texting" thing

[ Ha ha ha... ha. ]

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[foggybear]

You realize you potentially slipped up in front of a lawyer, right?

You seem to be pretty adept at texting my broheme

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[sidecars]

What in the hell is a broheme?

[ And with that, changing the subject on his mistake. ]