thisavrou | audio | locked from Riptide

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Okay, yeah, I know, bad timing Sideswipe, and we've got bigger problems, Sideswipe.

But... a lot of Not So Awesome stuff is going down with a friend of mine. And ... I...

[Some of the flippant nonchalance in his voice cracks. He goes quiet. This is really hard to admit, and yes, he KNOWS there's a lot going on right now. But it's been beyond him for a long time.]

[Too long.]

I don't know how to help. I wanna.

But I don't know how.

So if anyone's got a sec? Appreciate some feedback here. Y'know, anyone who isn't gonna yell at me for bringing this up right now. That'd be great.

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For you? I've got a whole minute.

[Wellp. Mom #2 gets a whole video of the noodle bot hunched up on the sole remaining bed in his quarters.]

... so. Um. My friend, yeah? Kiiiiinda went through the smelter. I mean, really bad.

Ever since, he's. Not him. And nothing I do helps so -- haha! Kinda at the end of my cabling here! Just a little.

Smelter? [It takes a moment, but things click into place. Smelting, melted down — wringer. Riptide. Probably.] Ok, I think I follow.

Okay, what have you been trying to do? Give me a few examples.

Sorry, I... get all weird when I say it direct and stuff.

[Saying My friend was tortured and murdered brutally is harder than saying he needs help.]

To get him to talk, or... distract him or... He won't tell me when something's bothering him anymore. And then he snaps at me if I do stupid scrap.

It's not him.

It's fine. I'm on the same page.

[There's a pause of a few beats as she thinks, expression thoughtful. Finally, she looks up at Sideswipe, and pulls a wry smile.]

I've got a suggestion, but you might not like the sound of it.

Go ahead and shoot. I'm pretty desperate.

I honestly think that the best thing you can do is give him some space.

Now, I'm not saying ignore him, or even stop hanging out. But when you two are together, you don't have to try and do anything special — exactly the opposite. Just be present, and be yourself.

[She pauses, and gives him a smile through the feed, expression soft.] You can let him know you're there for him without saying a word.

But that... that's like just doing nothing. Isn't it? I mean -- just sitting there like nothing's happened?

Is that really going to help?

You don't have to act like nothing's happened. Hell, you can't. But your actions hold a lot of meaning for him right now — too much fussing or doing is going to remind him, every time, of what he went through, and why you're doing it. You mean the best, but all he sees is you viewing him as someone that needs that kind of attention.

Rather than nothing, what I'm suggesting is that you support him by being there when he does need you. When he needs a little normalcy to feel like he's not falling apart. To remind him that, even with everything, you're still there, and you always will be.

That make a little more sense?

So I should... ignore him? Keep away from him? Unless he's wigging out?

I don't understand how that helps.

[He's trying his best, really. He is.]

We live together here so. Do I need to switch rooms again?

No, no — okay, try thinking about it from a different angle.

Imagine something terrible happened to you. World-shaking. Your life has been completely pulled apart, and now you're trying to put it back together. You're still dealing with it, and your friend is worried about you. You appreciate their concern, even if you're not in any state to tell them that right now.

But they keep expecting you to just be the same person you were before everything happened. Every time you don't react in the same way, your friend gets worried, and tries again, harder this time. You know they're only doing it because they care, but now, on top of sorting through your own issues, you can't even relax around your friend, because everything you're doing is making them more worried about you.

You're exhausted. And one day, you snap at them. Your friend is hurt — they were only trying to help. You feel bad, but you don't know what else to do. All you want right now, more than anything, is for your friend to be there for you, and accept who you are now — without worrying about how you've changed.

I...

[His face just sort of crumples.]

[What... does he even say to that? How does he answer that? It just makes it sound like everything he's done has been wrong. Like everything he's tried so hard to fix was the wrong thing.]

[He's tried so hard. So... hard.]

[And that's just made it worse?]

[Excuse him if he sort of curls up where he's sitting on the bench. Arms around his knees and face planted against them.]

... I didn't mean to make it that bad.

I know.

[She sighs, a slow, low exhale of breath. This poor kid.]

And Riptide knows, too.

Yeah... it'd... be nice if I could buy that. But I'm not so sure.

Give it time.

[beat;]

You want some company? Maybe we could grab a bite at mess?

I uh. I dunno if anything there is... y'know.

Bot-friendly.

True.

Stargazing?

Yeah, I guess that'd work.

See you there.

[Sure enough, Shep's there before Sideswipe, staring out at the star clusters flying by.]

Hey. Pull up a square.

A... square?

[He's a bit late. Mostly because he took a few minutes to scrub all the upset, angry tears off his face. Stupid leaking optics.]

[His weight shifts when he pads into the area, hands behind his head like nothing at all just happened.]

Like a piece of floor. [beat] Not literally, though. Just a figure of speech for "come sit with me".

[The casual posture is a nice touch, as if their previous conversation hadn't just been, well...

She rolls with it.]

I'm finding shapes in the stars. You ever do that?

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