[May 19th] Text/Video

[daintylegs]

[Locked FROM the Lost Light Crew]

[A lot happens in the short time he's been gone, and Tailgate's still wrapping his head around it. Several things are very clear, though, and the first thing Tailgate does when he gets back is angrily rip up that photo and toss it out the garbage chute. It doesn't make him feel good, but it's better than nothing.

In the end, he has so many questions. And he can't ask the people closest to him because he can't handle admitting how terribly, and completely, he had been manipulated. For something like this, it feels better to ask things from complete strangers.]

What do you do when you find out that the person you had spent months with turns out to be an absolute gearstick? No, that's not even the right or strongest word to use. What I should be asking is, what do you do when you found out that someone who told you that they cared about you, and offered to be your conjunx endura, turned out to be using you? What if he separated you from your friends and told you all sorts of terrible lies? What if he told you to prove your love to him by hurting someone else? What kind of person does that?

And how do you recover from it?

[Because he doesn't know. No one had ever paid attention to him the same way Getaway has, and every part of him feels crushed and kicked around. His shame over the matter is great enough that he carefully locks this conversation from his Lost Light crewmates. There's not much reason for it, truthfully, other than to hide the extent of how mind-blowingly stupid he is.]

[Locked TO The Lost Light Crew]

[But of course, there are some mind-blowingly stupid things he's done recently that he can't hide, and Tailgate chooses now to reveal them. This time he locks his post to his Lost Light crewmates, and puts on his bravest face.]

I have a confession to make.

[Instantly, his brave face crumbles.]

I'm... I'm...

I followed Tarn into his world. Yes, I know it was stupid, but while I was there... Um. Well...

Maybe it'll be better to show you.

[He turns his camera so that the purple badge on his chest can be seen. After a moment, he moves the camera back to his face.]

Please don't be angry. I... Tarn said I should, and I just... couldn't say no.

I'm sorry.

Comments

[daintylegs]

Well
he's in the Lost light brig now without his limbs and half his face
it doesn't make me feel that much better but he got what he deserved

I find it hard to believe that anyone could do that to you Niko.
You seem so worldly.

[vengeance_driven]

I have had many shitty things happen to me, but I still trust people. Most of the time it turns out good. Just a few turn out to be complete fucks.

So hang in there. The ones that are not complete fucks will help you however you can. I think that is how you recover.

[daintylegs]

How will you know when things turn out bad?
is there a way to spot people like that?

[vengeance_driven]

Not until they are assholes no. People that do that are really good at pretending, or else they wouldn't surprise you. So if they do it? It's not your fault, they've been training themselves a long time just to be able to fuck with you and whoever else they need to.

Like any other skill.

[daintylegs]

it seems so easy to be paranoid about everyone
to be suspicious of people because they MIGHT want to hurt you
or trick you into brainwashing someone else

that seems like a sad way to live

[vengeance_driven]

Being afraid of everyone before you speak to them is a very sad way to live. I hope this stupid man does not take that away from you. There is plenty of sadness about living without putting that on, too.

Also don't brainwash people if you can help it. No matter how good you like someone. That is the moral I would take from this. Not the part to be on constant asshole alert. Most people are assholes but some are pretty good assholes.

[daintylegs]

If I've learned anything from living on the Lost Light it's that sometimes brainwashing is unavoidable

but uh don't tell Megatron I said that
he likes brainswashing things a lot less than Rodimus does
and also he was the one I tried to brainwash back home

[vengeance_driven]

Okay, I won't tell him.

But if you can avoid brainwashing, then you probably should.

[advice for the ages.]