thisavrou | video

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[So since Rail's brief exploration effort in the prison, she's mostly stuck to exploring the rest of the ship for her remaining time. Checking out the different areas, trying to absorb all the odd-looking monsters and aliens she's seen so far. It was really like being on the set of a Hollywood movie - at least she thinks so. Or at least just a really long, vivid dream.

None of her exploring had given her any further answers to the questions she had, but she hadn't put much effort into asking and investigating. The prison was enough excitement, and she got some bombs back in the mail so there was no reason to go back.

But something had been on her mind recently. The job that was assigned to her, the one she didn't take seriously at all. Assistant Morale Officer. The title was laughable, but it still made her wonder why she was assigned to that job in the first place. Unintentional irony?

But looking for a little bit of fun on a quiet evening, she decides to try using her MID to send out one of those... weird future TV messages that keep popping up. She thinks she knows how to do it now.

A kid who's face is entirely covered with scars and old stitches appears on the screen.]

So hey! This thing is working right now, right? So I was thinking, when I first got here I was assigned to be an "assistant morale officer". And that means I just gotta tell you guys stuff so that you'll feel good and shit and you don't mutiny, right?

[Clearly, she's done her research.]

Well, since I take my jobs super seriously, I decided to come up with some ideas that might be helpful. Relieve some stress, you know? Here's what I got so far:

[Rail pulls out a piece of paper and holds it up to the MID so anyone can see it. It's a very short list, but here's what it has so far:]

-Fighting
-Destruction of property (doesn't matter who's or what)
-Gambling (?)
-Free candy, but only the good stuff

[Rail holds it up for what she thinks is long enough for everyone to look at it, before her grin replaces the paper. Yep, this is who was picked to improve morale.]

Great ideas so far, right? Obviously, I'm still working on it. If you got ideas though, I... dunno if I care that much. But hey, I ain't gonna stop you from saying 'em.

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[Liquid hasn't been in the best mood lately, thanks to the bullshit down on the station. He's going to be kicking himself forever for that. But upon seeing this video, and this list, he looks pretty damn amused. How's that for morale?]

I'd like you to know that I am behind your ideas one hundred percent.

[Who was pretty much created to fight? This guy!]

[To be honest, Rail wasn't expecting too much agreement. The fact that at least someone was on board was kind of exciting.]

That's good to hear. We'll have this place all fired up in no time. Those are just the basics... I'll think of some better ideas later.

[That or it'll be completely destroyed and everyone will be dead.]

Well, right now you've got a solid foundation. I don't particularly care about the gambling bit, but it is a popular pastime.

[Fighting and destruction and free candy, though, that's right up his alley.]

...So what counts as 'the good stuff'?

Just add swearing and graffiti and you have a pretty comprehensive list

y do i need to add swearng is thats something not allowed

like you should be able to say any kind of shit you want whats stoping you

the graffiti is a good idea thogh

Oh, I just know swearing has brought my morale up in a variety of situations. That's all.

oh yeh same here!! some peeple get soooooo mad if you swear a lot, but i do it anyway

I don't care what others might say, I think you're the right person for this job.

hey im glad u think so. i think these r some pretty solid ideas here

im rail by the way

I'm Tex. Good to meet you.

Hey, sparring and candy sound like pretty good ideas. I don't know about gambling, but I guess that's the gambler's problem. You can't just go around destroying things, though, you know. We'd have to put a stop to that, you can't just do whatever you want, you know.

[ Well, the general 'we', anyway. Edward could use his alchemy, but he's gonna abstain if he can. ]

Edited 2016-04-29 01:12 (UTC)

Why not? I'm not gonna blow up the ship, if that's what you're thinking. I don't wanna get myself launched into space.

As far as anything else though, if I wanna blow it up, that's what I'm gonna do.

This is where we have to live until this place decides to put us back home. Why should we go around destroying it? That seems pretty stupid to me!

[Oh god, what were the captains thinking when they handed out jobs.]

I love free candy.

You might want to think the other ideas through a bit more though. Like, destruction of property might help out one person's stress, but it's proooobably going to increase the stress of the person whose property was destroyed. Just putting that out there.

Who doesn't?

[Rail pauses to think about that for a second, and then offers another well-thought out offer:]

What if it was the Captain's stuff? Or whoever's running the show around here?

Suggestions: enforceable?

[Rinzler will back you on the first item, at least.]

[Oh man, texting. She hates this one. Does she have to respond back in text? She's not sure but she'll give it a try.]

i dunno i gues if enogh peple wanted it?

Support item one.

[Rinzler's not sure how wanting is supposed to make things happen. ~~Or if he counts as a peple~~. But hey, the offer's there.]

cool. thats the most important one you know. that and blowing up peeples stuf

actually blowing up stuf if the most importnat

[...]

Specify "stuff"?

i dont gotta specify

just blow up whatever u fel like blowwing up

id blow up the captains if i could get to em

i mean i guess dont blow stuf up if itll kill you but otherwise who cares

[Lots of people care, Rail.]

[Sigh. Another malware. And the ideas had sounded so promising...]

System damage: to avoid.

you thinkin im gonna blow up the ship? im not that dumb, i dont wanna get sucked into space and die u no.

dont care about anything else thogh. i dont belive all that crap about how they are gonna be all nice and send us home if we work hard enogh

Uhm. I don't know that fighting each other would be a morale booster. Fighting practice and sparring, sure, but if you're talking actual fighting?

[ Yeah, no. That'll just decrease morale, as far as Wash can see. Cause more problems and lead to rifts between crew members. But that's not the only inadvisable item on Rail's list, even. ]

I'd argue that destruction of property would be even worse. That's just asking for the crew to hate each other, and that's kind of exactly the opposite of what we need. You know?

Yeah, I'm talking about actual fighting - sparring's okay, but it's not as fun as the real thing. And it's a pretty good morale booster for whoever wins, haha!

Hmm, what about destroying shit in that prison?

Maybe, but not so much for whoever loses. It's important to try to keep up the morale of as many people as possible.

The prison is better, I guess. But still something to be careful about. Destroying things just because you want to...tends not to be a good idea. I'm just saying.

Well, they can improve their own morale by not sucking at fighting, haha!

[Clearly the best choice for morale officer.]

I destroy things all the time because I want to - but I guess people do get pretty pissed off about it.

But not everyone comes from somewhere where they needed to know how to fight? That's not their fault, and it's no reason to go around beating them up.

[ Best choice for a morale officer on a ship full of vikings or something, maybe. ]

Yeah, they do, so not doing that seems like the better morale lifter. Also, "because I want to" isn't a legitimate reason to do something like destroy.

If anyone ever shows up who's worth fighting, sure, but the pushovers around here are just depressing.

Whatever. I'll just take the free candy. Idiots should've done something about that problem a long time ago.

sonds like u just havent met the right challenge yet, unlesss your just picking on a bunch of wussies

to bad i dont have any right now, but i think it shold be a requirment the captains give it to us

That's 'cause all this place brings in is a bunch of wussies. None of these losers could fight their way out of a paper bag.

Should be. I bet the only reason they won't is 'cause they'd rather waste money on stupid stuff like protecting whales or whatever.

[Not that she was here for that or has any real context for it, but it's still stupid.]

i think i can change your mind on that

i dont see why they cant protect whales and get free candy. its not like they pay us anything. im feel pretty ripped off u no

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