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Video
[There's no particular view, just some market stalls, off kilter and moving a little as Yondu starts talking in his drawl (which sounds markedly southern U.S.).] So, I'm tryin' to build up a collection again. I get little figurines. You know, of animals and people and stuff? And I line my workspace with 'em. Sort of good luck charms. [His blue hand comes into view, showing what looks like a tiny porcelain deer person about four inches tall or so. And it is, frankly, adorable.]
But see, I didn't exactly show up with any of 'em.
So I'm lookin' for some new ones. So tell me if y'all come across any places that got good selections of these sort of things.
This is another'n I got. [And he switches items, showing a jeweled frog thing. He misses his cute little collection of adorable crap. Don't question it.] Just as an example.
But see, I didn't exactly show up with any of 'em.
So I'm lookin' for some new ones. So tell me if y'all come across any places that got good selections of these sort of things.
This is another'n I got. [And he switches items, showing a jeweled frog thing. He misses his cute little collection of adorable crap. Don't question it.] Just as an example.
Video - (I am so sorry)
What happens next is not exactly the judgement call of someone thinking about consequences here. Eddie pops open the video and blurts the first thing that he thought when he saw the man.
And no, he didn't bother actually paying attention to Yondu's video. He just points and goes:)
You're the one who talks about eating people!
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Let me guess, Quill had somethin' to do with this?
Don't worry, it depends on how stringy you are.
Video
(Says this name very seriously and very respectfully. As far as Eddie was concerned, Quill was some sort of prince.
He gives Yondu a rather quizzical look, his nose scrunched up. Two thin arms cross over his chest and he doesn't look very impressed.)
Ha-ha. He already told me that you're full of it.
(....But...just in case. Eddie sniffs and looks off camera.)
I'm pretty stringy.
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[Excuse Yondu, this is even more hilarious. But he's nice enough to Peter to not ruin the kid's delusions. Generally, he's proud of the idiot. As frustrated as he gets with him, he deserves to have some hair-brained half-pint look up to him.]
[But when he laughs, he has a mouth full of jagged teeth. It's easy to see why a boy new to aliens might have believed Yondu for a long while.]
About how old are you? In Terran cycles?
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Then Yondu laughs and Eddie stares at his teeth. It brings a very clear memory of a clown with a wide stretched grin, and he felt assured somehow. It would have never laughed like that before eating him whole. Or any other kid for that matter.
So Eddie relaxes.)
Uh- is that supposed to mean earth? I'm twelve- I just turned a couple days ago I think. I don't know how specific dates are here.
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Well, let me tell you a little somethin' about Star-Lord, boy. He actually learned to fly his first ship when he was ten.
[A nice secret? An almost brag? Who would have thought!]
Picked up almost everything pretty quick. [He had to. Yondu couldn't just set him out into the world with a trusting heart when he knew the man had a father like Ego. Still doesn't know Quill's figured that out yet.] Learned to sneak into places pretty good, too. He was tiny, then. Worked out for 'im.
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But then Eddie outright gasps and sits up ramrod straight.)
He was tiny? But he's huge!
(Or at least he looked pretty big from what Eddie could see on the video. Like, a guy who could seriously take someone on in a fight. Eddie's eyes are as wide as billiard balls.)
I'm tiny.
(Said like this is a marvel. Thing is, kids like him, kids like anyone really, liked knowing there were people out there like them.
Yondu's got Eddie's attention pretty much completely with this story, that's for sure.)
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[Yondu is at least smart enough to not encourage the kid to go theivin' openly on the network. But he's also not going to tell the kid that he can't work towards something admirable. Quill might have come with Celestial bonus points, but he was raised with average mortal limitations in mind and he did pretty damn good with those. Why can't this kid?]
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(Now that was something else. Eddie wasn't a perfect kid, but he also wasn't a bad kid. His mischief was the good old fashioned kid-mischief. Not the illegal kind of mischief. So it's not a bad idea on Yondu's behalf.)
What are--
(He begins to ask, but then his mouth begins to try and shape those words and it isn't going to happen. So he gives up, shaking his head. Aliens. Aliens existed all over and if he honestly thought he was going to be able to pronounce even half of them...Well that's a joke.)
What are you? (Is what he winds up asking instead.)
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We pretty much get kids the same way as Terrans, so I started out a little squirt like you, too. You'd be surprised how much y'all Terrans got in common with some other races.
So what else did Star-Lord tell ya?
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(Did Yondu have half a horse body? Color Eddie intrigued.)
Yeah I haven't exactly seen any you know- the green guys with the biiiig eyes and big heads and thin bodies that want to probe you and steal your cows.
(He moves his hands around his head to form the very earth-stereotypical version of an alien. Roswell. He remembers reading about it once. Very serious, very scary stuff.)
Not too much. We only talked the one time when I first got here. He just told me to not worry about you. (That Yondu was actually a good guy. Eddie doesn't say this, but he is sort of thinking it.)
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Wait, green guys that do what now?
[He's going to need him to back up a little, there.]
[He'll worry about Peter spoiling his reputation later. Not that, you know, publicly asking for cute toys did him all that much good.]
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You know. They're the aliens who steal people in their sleeps and put stuff in their heads and up their uh-
('Asses' almost slips from him but it doesn't. Eddie purses his lips together in thought before holding up his finger, indicating for Yondu to wait. He then bows forward and there's the sound of some stuff being moved around.
After a couple minutes of this, Eddie holds up a picture and points to it.)
These guys.
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Well.
[A child just brought up interspecies anal experimentation and Yondu is about cornered by the sheer force of the awkward.]
I reckon that's one way to say hello. Guess I'll be keepin' any green guys with big ol' black eyes at a healthy distance.
[He doesn't know if Eddie's right or wrong. He can't assume he's lying, even with scribbled images. This could be a completely accurate warning.]
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Eddie doesn't know if he's right or wrong either. Those articles had been pretty convincing. He nods very seriously.)
They take away memories and then put people back on earth.
(Probably.)
I think I'll take my chances with you eating kids.
(He smiles a little and see, look, not as awkward. Sort of.)
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Always did wonder how Terran tasted.
[He's pretty much never going to let it die, especially since Peter fell for it for years and years.]
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(He waves his thin arms through the air.)
I'm practically made for alien stew. I don't really know much about taste. Probably salty.
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[He's going to run with the joke, because at least this poor kid gets it.]
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That actually just makes it funnier.)
As long as you actually kill me before cooking me. I don't want to go down like a lobster. That'd suck so much.
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Which'ns are lobsters?
[He needs to clear that bit up first. He's pretty decent with Terran animals but that's a new one on him.]