Voice ☂ 002

[chaoticluptral]

So, uh, it sounds like most of you aren't used to this whole "end of the world, coming back again" she-bang and it's got everyone all out of sorts. Which is starting to make a shitty place get even shitter.

So I'm here to help you out. Let's call it "Your Guide to Surviving the End of the World" by, yours truly, IPRE’s Number One Evocation Wizard, Lup.

I'm not gonna get into the whole lecture about the planes of existence because we all already know that shit, am I right? We're like the poster children for coming from different planes of reality so. Instead I'm gonna give you the real facts, from someone who's seen the world end 50 fucking times.

First, don't give up and don't don't lose sight of who you are and the people you're with. Going through this stuff can tear you down, make you wanna give in. But out here in space, that's all you got. So you have to hold onto and believe that we're all gonna make it outta here.

And... that's it!

I mean it's the end of the fucking world, how much more straightforward can you get? You don’t need me telling you what it was like. But I guess if you still have questions, I'm a 50 time end of the world survivor so AMA if you really wanna get the deets.

Comments

Voice;

[neveroutwrenched]

Just out of curiosity, what makes you so sure it's 'the end of the world'?

[chaoticluptral]

End of "a" world, if you wanna get technical. But it was "the" world we were on.

The part where it got ripped to shreds by forces unseen seems pretty "ending" to me.

[neveroutwrenched]

Oh, right. That.

[Ratchet had forgotten about that detail...he hadn't been there but it was still weird how easily planet destruction starts to slip your mind once it's become a not-so-rare occurrence.]

...fifty times, huh?

[chaoticluptral]

Fifty times. You'd think it's something that you'd lose count of but... nope! All still pretty memorable.

[neveroutwrenched]

You uh, seem pretty chill about it.

[chaoticluptral]

I mean... once it keeps happening, you kinda just have to get used to it. Otherwise you'd be fall on the floor and spend the entire cycle crying and that's just fucking unproductive.

[neveroutwrenched]

[Ratchet raises his eyebrows in surprise, but also...curiosity.]

Did you ever try and stop it?

[chaoticluptral]

Of course I did. But it's not exactly easy to fight off a massive and inhuman force of hunger and rage no matter what your stats are. The best thing we could do was escape and keep trying to figure out how to keep going.

text

[inconsequence]

Very helpful. I'll be sure to tell my friends.
And yet, speaking as someone who has ended a world, far from applicable in every case.

[chaoticluptral]

I was mostly referring to the case that happened just about a month ago that most of us were there for.

[inconsequence]

Evidence would suggest it was not, in fact, the end of the world seeing as some manner of it endured.

[chaoticluptral]

That's the point! Something always endures. We endured.

[inconsequence]

Therefore contradicting the inherent notion of an end to the world.

[chaoticluptral]

I mean if you really wanna get pedantic about it but last I checked this isn't Fantasy Reddit.

[inconsequence]

Perhaps we ought to get a Sci-Fi Reddit, then.

[chaoticluptral]

I think the less Reddits, the better the off the multiple planes of the universe are.

[inconsequence]

“Fewer.”

I cannot be faulted for the suggestion if you were the one to bring it up.

[chaoticluptral]

fewer. my bad dude. I never picked up the "pointless pedantry" skill. seemed kinda like a waste of time. i mean i could be lighting things on fire instead! no time for that nerdy shit.

[inconsequence]

I commend you for the attitude, but I fail to see why one cannot have both.

[voice]

[ryuuzaki]

Fifty?

[Boy, he sounds tired. But also sort of interested?]

[chaoticluptral]

That's right. I wasn't lying, m'man.

[ryuuzaki]

How do you survive it? I was impressed with what you did in the Ingress Complex.

[chaoticluptral]

We escaped. As long as one of us made it back to our ship, we'd all restart back on our ship, the Starblaster, exactly on the spot where we at when we left our home plane.

Less visually impressive, but still pretty impressive to keep avoiding getting caught up in the end of the world for over 50 years.

[ryuuzaki]

It is impressive.

[But his tone is so flat that it might be hard to tell whether or not he means it: just now, he does.]

Did it happen once a year?

voice;

[brokeassgoing]

Okay but what if we're put in tanks of our own boogers and put through a dream again? Or you wake up thinking you're a duck? What then, oh Miss Cleo?

[chaoticluptral]

Would a duck have such existential concerns about the end of the world?

[brokeassgoing]

Yeah, pretty sure. They can't eat bread, who the hell wouldn't!

[chaoticluptral]

Do ducks dream of edible bread more like.

[brokeassgoing]

No but I'm almost positive geese dream of edible flesh.

[chaoticluptral]

Yeah, geese suck. Way down on the list of "worthwhile animals".

[brokeassgoing]

Hear they taste good though? Or is that little hens or whatever?

video

[wallride]

[this is good this is the stuff lúcio tries to enact daily.]

This is better advice than it seems at first glance. I could remix it...

[chaoticluptral]

Oh shit, yes! This would make a hella dank remix. Instantly memetic.

[wallride]

[he sends a short clip of something he's already done: unfortunately the player is not a musical genius so please pretend it's super dank. the illest lup-beats.]

I dup this the space station's first meme! Congrats on the honours, Lup!

[chaoticluptral]

Aww yeah.

Now we just gotta make it go viral. Live on in this rusty old spaceship forever!

[wallride]

I'm gonna start a radio station when I get the chance. It'll be the jingle. For what? Everything.

Voice

[ruffboi]

Mm. Okay. I got half of it, and the half I got was pretty alarming. But all in all, even with the static, a solid 10 of a speech.

[chaoticluptral]

Thank you, thank you.

I'm bowing now. Since we're on voice, I thought you ought to know.

[ruffboi]

Any bites? I don't remember the end of the world stuff so well, but I can help out with other things. Like punching, or jumping off a moving train, or time travel.

video? how dare you not see his face?

[chaoticlootral]

Are you really giving away self-help tapes for free? Big mistake, you could be makin' some beaucoup inspirational bucks here.