thisavrou | text; (locked from nathan drake)

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text; (locked from nathan drake)

[ It's been two weeks since she's woken up in the Complex, the effects of her cryostasis wearing off, finally. The effects of her death and resurging, that's another story. Her throat and lungs aren't feeling so raw but the latter still feels rough. At least she no longer feels like she's going to choke with each breath she takes. And the hacking up blood has stopped. On the other hand, the nightmares of the exact moment don't come as often but they're there.

They're always there. ]

I was always under the impression that when you died, you stayed dead. There were no second chances. Maybe I haven't come to terms with it. I've come close to death's door too often but never like that.

Has anyone ever...?

[ If anyone here has died and returned, wouldn't asking bring back unpleasant memories? Elena's aware of that, unfortunately there's only been one other person whom she's been able to talk to who can relate.

This isn't something she can talk to Nate about because of how sensitive a topic it is between them still, and that's why she's locked the post from him. She needs to know if there are others.

Plus there's just one more thing... ]

My wedding ring also seems to be missing... It's plain silver and has an engraving on the inside. It's been missing since I woke up in the Complex.

If it's shown up anywhere then please, I'd appreciate a heads up.

( ooc; the ring is gone forever, and although the post is locked from older!nate, it's still free game for anyone who knows him to bring up the post/topic/any conversation to him. c: )

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I've seen a lot of people die on the Moira, resurged by the Ingress. [Viscerally so.] Save for one case, everyone has always come back from it.

There's a chance that the Ingress took your ring.

were you on moira? because people coming back from dead is hardly anything new.

I've witnessed crew deaths but I don't think I've seen them around after. I know we're resurged by the ingress, it's just something that's harder to process when it actually happens to you.

[ The last comment has her groaning. What is she supposed to do about that? This is like when she'd found Nate missing his. ]

That's just hunkydory then.

I was on the ship. But there have been some cases where people don't come back. You're missing the point. I'm not asking for a ratio of who resurges and who hasn't. I'm asking if anyone's gone through the resurging process.

I have questions for them. Whether they'll come forward to talk about a sensitive topic, that's another thing.

[ She wants answers. She wants to talk to those who've died here and have been resurged, what it was like for them. What came of it,
aside from being alive again. ]

[ generally he leaves the network alone, because he really doesn't care about social media at the best of times, but something about Elena's post keeps haunting him. ]

'Ever died and come back', you mean.

I didn't want to outright say it but. Yeah.

Over a dozen times through a virtual simulation and twice for real.

But not through the Ingress.

More than I probably should have. Doesn't get any easier no matter how you come by it.

[ She can never thank him enough for all that he's done for her. He'd been there immediately at her side when she'd come out of it and he'd been at her bedside until she'd been too exhausted to keep her eyes open, the sedative working to knock her out until Nate had shown up.

It crushes at her more than he can know, how she'd treated him. The time they'd spent walking on egg shells and not talking for so long.

And then he'd let her tightly grasp his hand while the only sound between them had been her dragging breaths, struggling to breathe and keep up with the oxygen system. ]

Twice for real...
How did you...?

[ Had he told her that in everything he'd told them? ]

Can I ask how..?
I'll understand if you don't care to think back on it.

Honestly? I can't remember most of 'em. Probably for stupid reasons anyway. Bit off more than I could chew, running around in enemy territory- but then just about everywhere back home can be considered that now.

Ghost brings me back. So long as it's around, I won't stay down.

[ Adrien was well aware that he didn't make it easy to be his friend. He held no anger towards her for what had broken down between them, if anything he took full responsibility for the break down.

There was never any question, in his mind at least, where he would be when she truly needed him. Be it on the Moira when she'd gone into cryo, to the colony with the children, to Flynn and now this.

It was all he could give.

As for her unspoken question. There hadn't been any purpose to revealing the events at the time when he'd explained so much of his past, present and future to Nate and Elena. In fact, bringing the subject up would have felt self-indulgent. As if he were seeking sympathy, perhaps understanding; when he deserved none. ]

The first was an ambush, by the natives of a planet we were sent to destroy. We were pinned down, covering the retreat of non-combatants and took heavy fire from arrows on fire and poison tipped.

[ Unspoken was the suggestion that those who had held the line had done so understanding they weren't getting out alive.

The second death, he paused for a couple of minutes, before he decided to go ahead and send the truth. ]

The second was at the hands of my Captain. She separated me from my life support device on a planet that was lethal to humanoids and held me down until the atmosphere killed me.

Oddly enough both instances happened on the same planet. Neheda was pretty put out with me.

Wait so the second time was done with the intention to kill?

[ Nothing about that wasn't right. Who would do that? The first part she could understand but the second time? That was unbelievable; she was stunned by reading those lines over, more than once. ]

And how did you come back?

Ghost? Is that a program? A person? Something like the Ingress?

Actually, I'm not completely sure what it is. It's sort of like an AI, tech's more advanced than anything we've been able to figure out, and it seems like there's a touch of the supernatural to it.

No wonder you call it 'ghost'. But in what way does it keep you from dying full out, do not pass go, do not collect 200?

Yes.

[ Looking at just the one little word sitting on the screen Adrien tried to determine if there was anyway he could further explain the situation. ]

I am a useful asset to her plans. She needed to control that initial death in order to prepare me for the ones to come.

Control death, control you.

[ That was fucked up. ]

It makes me think of the Ingress and what a second time here would be like.

[ He couldn't deny the truth in that initial statement, so he let it go. ]

While I haven't experienced it, directly, I've read enough about it from the files back on the Moira.

Sometimes being able to come back is ... worse, Elena. We're not meant to reset, there is always a cost.

Couldn't say for sure. I'd say it's something to do with the Light they possess. Ghosts are fragments of this giant entity called the Traveler. Stuff happened, Earth almost got ruined and the Traveler managed to keep us from getting wiped out. Then it sent out those little guys to... I guess 'recruit' in a way? Guardians. To keep fighting the good fight.

Ghost brought me back from being dead, so we're kind of linked, now. Not sure if there's a limit to being revived, but that's not something I want to test. Kind of messes with your memories though, and those are hard enough to hold onto.

It's called equivalent exchange. Nothing is done without a price.

My lungs, they're still not healed, Adrien. There has to be a reason for that. Unless that's my price for resurging.

Your memory loss is the price you pay for being revived? That makes sense. There's always a cost to something, why not tack a price tag to that while we're at it?

Is that the only way you can be linked to your Ghost? They need to find you and revive you and you're like best friends for life?

Actually the memory thing's a separate issue. Dying actually helps spark some of those things you don't know you've forgotten- at least in my case. But I'm sure there's some price to it, if not just having to experience dying in itself. Who needs that, right?

I'm sure it's more complicated than that but I never really asked. Maybe it has to do with compatibility.

Edited 2017-07-10 06:49 (UTC)

Why is the memory thing a separate issue? If I were in a better mindset I'd probably throw in some kind of a joke but things are still a little fresh.

And maybe. Compatibility is a necessity in any relationship.

Seems to be a common problem for Exos, but when you can run for hundreds of years I'd think that's a pretty reasonable expectation, and after the initial Ghost reboot, who knows how much sticks?

...although speaking of- Well. This wonderful topic. Did you... Here?

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