text; + action options; (cw character death)

[sketchycharacter]

[locked to people who know Elena Fisher]

elena's dead

[....yeah that's all. Odds are good that Nate will not want to reply to questions, condolences or comments regarding the recent tragedy, though Chloe Frazer might. However, he can be found...]

wandering; Once the shock has passed—if it ever does—Nate wanders for hours. Fuck, maybe days, he doesn't know. He just doesn't want to go back to the house in Region 1 where she isn't.

Eventually he finds himself in a well-wooded park. For lack of anything else to do, he climbs a tree.

at home; When he finally does make it back, Nate parks his ass on the couch, where he'll be sleeping until—well, he can't count on there being an "until." Maybe he'll just live on the couch forever. Sorry, Pepper, Varric, etc.

at the ingress complex; Nate comes by the facility a couple of times, to ask for news or if they can guarantee that they'll be able to bring her back, because he knows that people have returned, and he knows that they don't always.

He walks away both times, unable to stand it if the answer is no.]

Comments

[sketchycharacter]

[Nate's not sure why he finally decided to come home. Maybe it wasn't actually a decision; it could have been something his body decided on its own when he got too tired, or when the sight of other people got to be too much when he's never felt so alone in his life.

The fact that no one was home but the animals when he got there didn't make it worse. Didn't make it better, either. He might have made it here but he hasn't come out of this horrible fugue state either.

He doesn't react to the sound of Tony and Hawke coming through the door, just keeps twisting his wedding ring. When he feels her sit down beside him, his hand spasms, clamping down on his finger so hard it hurts.]

[arcreact]

[ Ordinarily he'd have a nice, long bitching session about how they tore up half the planet looking for him, but... nah.

Tony wavers for a moment, like he's really not sure what to do with himself. Did he think very hard about what to do or say when they actually found Nate? No, not at all. It's not like he's good with these types of situations.

Hawke breaks the ice, though - and he follows suit without giving it too much thought, wordlessly dropping himself onto the couch on Nate's other side. ]

[sketchycharacter]

[There's nothing Tony and Hawke can do to make this better. Nothing will change the fact that Elena's gone, died on another world where he couldn't even try to protect her, and he has no idea what to do with himself for the next few hours or minutes, forget about days.

But if they can't make him feel better, the presence of a friend on each side makes him feel less alone. It's a small speck of light in overwhelming darkness. It cuts through the numbness.

Nate starts to shake. Just trembling at first, and then stronger, until he lets out a long, shaky breath and sort of collapses in on himself, hunched over his lap, tight fists on either side of his head.

No. No. No.]

[otiosity]

[Hawke had been content to sit in silence and let Tenzin amble about and play in her lap. She also knew there was nothing that could be said to take the pain away and it was arrogant and cruel to pretend there was.

But then Nate hunches over and she glances over at him. She's been there. After her mother died she mostly just sat there with her face in her hands while people tried to get her to move or eat or do a thousand things she didn't want to do. Then Merrill, sweet Merrill, had simply reached out and taken Hawke's hands in her small delicate ones and held them until they stopped shaking.

Hawke reaches out and puts a hand on his arm then slowly moves down until she reaches his hand and slips her fingers between his so he can grip her hand tightly.

It's not small or delicate like Merrill's, her hands are rough and calloused but smaller than Nate's and easy to grip. That has to count for something, right?]

[arcreact]

[ Tony isn't as forward as Hawke, and finds himself feeling considerably more lost. The reality of the situation is starting to settle over him like a terrifying weight. Part of him wants to bolt and find Pepper right this second, hold onto her and never let ago.

But a bigger part knows Nate needs people the most right now.

After a long moment, he settles a heavy hand on Nate's shoulder and gives it a firm squeeze. There's not much else he can offer, other than hey man, we're right here. ]

[sketchycharacter]

[For a minute or so, it's like Nate doesn't even realize they're still here.

But then there's a small twitch to his hand. A drop to his shoulder. And slowly, slowly, the trembling eases and then stops. He's not holding back sobs of grief or rage anymore.

It's not better. It can't be, when Elena died painfully and left him here alone and there's nothing he can do about either of those facts. But with Hawke and Tony on both sides of him, solid and alive and making him a little less alone, maybe he's a little better.

Eventually, he's able to lift himself back up and rest against the couch, exhaustion writ in all of his features. He doesn't speak, but he doesn't let go of Hawke's hand of shrug off Tony. It's enough to send a message.

Don't go.]