Gaige (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
kickeminthepistons) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
thisavrou2017-02-23 01:05 am
kickeminthepistons) wrote in thisavrou2017-02-23 01:05 am
Entry tags:
- VIDEO - live from the Vault House -
[[OOC: This is a joint post. Denim-blue is Gaige, orange is Krieg, and black is Zer0.]]
[The video feed turns on, and there's a face that's too close to the TAB. Not, like, straight up against the eyeball, but close enough that you can only see the face: green eyes, red hair, a little bandage on the cheek. Her mouth scrunches up thoughtfully as she backs up, looking at something behind the TAB for guidance. An unseen cameraman. Come to think of it, the feed is bobbing up and down, like the TAB is sticking to something floating. She backs up enough that the camera can see her in all her punk rock glory, and the interior of a fancy tree fort. There's very little in it, and very little concern for what gets thrown where.]
Okay, that should be good, right? [The cameraman doesn't answer. She finally looks straight at the camera.] Awesome. So! Okay! Hello, to all my soon-to-be-subscribers! You don't know it yet, but I'm about to become your favorite it ECHOcaster-- or, well, um-- they said this was a TAB, so maybe-- TABcast? Whatever, I'm going to be your new favorite talking head on your comm devices.
[She keeps talking quickly, with the kind of nerves that channel any stage fright into adrenaline:] My name's Gaige -- I'm a major league pro Vault Hunter and gadgeteer extraordinaire -- and this is a behind-the-scenes look at my fun-filled life of shooting up bandits and monsters for fun and profit. [A pause, before she adds,] … eeexcept maybe they don't have any bandits here? Whatever, we'll find SOMETHING that needs to be blown up, and then YOU will be close enough to the action to--
[MEANWHILE, this lanky ass helmet wearing noodleperson drops in behind Gaige. Like literally, he just drops down from the ceiling. Maybe there's a hole in the roof, maybe he was doing some spiderman shit, like who even knows. He manages to land without making a sound because ninjas are slick that way. Once he realizes that Gaige is recording something, he promptly starts heading for the nearest exit. He doesn't want to interrupt, but mostly he doesn't want to end up all over this network thing.]
[UNFORTUNATELY for the lanky ass noodleperson, he runs right into a giant slab of towering muscle shaped more or less like an extremely stacked human man. His exit is inconveniently blocked, and also rudely called attention to, when the shirtless individual's gaze drifts from his little ninja buddy to his little anarchy pal.]
IT'S RUDE TO LEAVE WITHOUT SAYING HELLO!
[He has a voice like a freight train with volume control to match. Does he know he's interrupting Gaige's ECHOcast? It's likely. Does he care? Not at all.]
Hello.
[So much for sneaking out unnoticed. Hopefully the hurried and slightly irritated greeting is enough to appease the shirtless muscle stack, because that's all Ninja McSneaky is going to say before trying to duck around him to make his escape.]
[Unfortunately, Gaige hasn't just been talking through this commotion, and gets one cybernetic hand on his shoulder before he can get away from the camera.] I think Krieg's got the right idea. Why don't you introduce yourself, Zer0? Name, age, sex, five-page backstory, all the good stuff that you've been holding out on.
[To help out - because he is a very helpful guy - Krieg puts his hands on Zer0's shoulders, spins him in place to face the camera, and then takes one of the assassin's skinny noodle elbows in his hand and manipulates the limb to cause Zer0 to wave at the camera.]
And don't forget to smiiiiiiile!
[Oh, there are no smiles. There is a holographic " :| " projected in front of Zer0's faceplate, though. Close enough, right. He is not on board with these shenanigans okay.]
I'm very busy. / Perhaps I'll have time later, / Though it's not likely.
[He's just going to let Krieg waggle his arm around for a moment while he makes a shooing motion at Gaige with his free hand. FUN IS OVER]
[Gaige gives an office stare at the camera.] Sooooyeah. That's Zer0 in a nutshell: Man of mystery, dork of no-fun. [But she grins after, with a faint hiss of a laugh -- he's a friend, so if he's not going to join in the fun, then she's having the fun at his expense.] And over here -- Deathtrap, point it up a little higher, you're probably cutting off like half his face right now -- over here, we have Krieg, who makes up for Zer0 by shouting about nipples. These two guys are like my partners in crime!
[Krieg absolutely takes that as his cue to laugh - a loud, raucous, vaguely unhinged sound.]
MnahahahAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! NIPPLE SALADS!!
[As for Zer0, he has nothing to add to any of this. He just silently glances between Krieg and Gaige, a red ". . ." blipping up in front of his face plate. Sigh.]
All right! So, since this is the first TABcast, how about Krieg and I answer some of your viewer questions? And we can probably force Zer0 to help, somehow.
[The video feed turns on, and there's a face that's too close to the TAB. Not, like, straight up against the eyeball, but close enough that you can only see the face: green eyes, red hair, a little bandage on the cheek. Her mouth scrunches up thoughtfully as she backs up, looking at something behind the TAB for guidance. An unseen cameraman. Come to think of it, the feed is bobbing up and down, like the TAB is sticking to something floating. She backs up enough that the camera can see her in all her punk rock glory, and the interior of a fancy tree fort. There's very little in it, and very little concern for what gets thrown where.]
Okay, that should be good, right? [The cameraman doesn't answer. She finally looks straight at the camera.] Awesome. So! Okay! Hello, to all my soon-to-be-subscribers! You don't know it yet, but I'm about to become your favorite it ECHOcaster-- or, well, um-- they said this was a TAB, so maybe-- TABcast? Whatever, I'm going to be your new favorite talking head on your comm devices.
[She keeps talking quickly, with the kind of nerves that channel any stage fright into adrenaline:] My name's Gaige -- I'm a major league pro Vault Hunter and gadgeteer extraordinaire -- and this is a behind-the-scenes look at my fun-filled life of shooting up bandits and monsters for fun and profit. [A pause, before she adds,] … eeexcept maybe they don't have any bandits here? Whatever, we'll find SOMETHING that needs to be blown up, and then YOU will be close enough to the action to--
[MEANWHILE, this lanky ass helmet wearing noodleperson drops in behind Gaige. Like literally, he just drops down from the ceiling. Maybe there's a hole in the roof, maybe he was doing some spiderman shit, like who even knows. He manages to land without making a sound because ninjas are slick that way. Once he realizes that Gaige is recording something, he promptly starts heading for the nearest exit. He doesn't want to interrupt, but mostly he doesn't want to end up all over this network thing.]
[UNFORTUNATELY for the lanky ass noodleperson, he runs right into a giant slab of towering muscle shaped more or less like an extremely stacked human man. His exit is inconveniently blocked, and also rudely called attention to, when the shirtless individual's gaze drifts from his little ninja buddy to his little anarchy pal.]
IT'S RUDE TO LEAVE WITHOUT SAYING HELLO!
[He has a voice like a freight train with volume control to match. Does he know he's interrupting Gaige's ECHOcast? It's likely. Does he care? Not at all.]
Hello.
[So much for sneaking out unnoticed. Hopefully the hurried and slightly irritated greeting is enough to appease the shirtless muscle stack, because that's all Ninja McSneaky is going to say before trying to duck around him to make his escape.]
[Unfortunately, Gaige hasn't just been talking through this commotion, and gets one cybernetic hand on his shoulder before he can get away from the camera.] I think Krieg's got the right idea. Why don't you introduce yourself, Zer0? Name, age, sex, five-page backstory, all the good stuff that you've been holding out on.
[To help out - because he is a very helpful guy - Krieg puts his hands on Zer0's shoulders, spins him in place to face the camera, and then takes one of the assassin's skinny noodle elbows in his hand and manipulates the limb to cause Zer0 to wave at the camera.]
And don't forget to smiiiiiiile!
[Oh, there are no smiles. There is a holographic " :| " projected in front of Zer0's faceplate, though. Close enough, right. He is not on board with these shenanigans okay.]
I'm very busy. / Perhaps I'll have time later, / Though it's not likely.
[He's just going to let Krieg waggle his arm around for a moment while he makes a shooing motion at Gaige with his free hand. FUN IS OVER]
[Gaige gives an office stare at the camera.] Sooooyeah. That's Zer0 in a nutshell: Man of mystery, dork of no-fun. [But she grins after, with a faint hiss of a laugh -- he's a friend, so if he's not going to join in the fun, then she's having the fun at his expense.] And over here -- Deathtrap, point it up a little higher, you're probably cutting off like half his face right now -- over here, we have Krieg, who makes up for Zer0 by shouting about nipples. These two guys are like my partners in crime!
[Krieg absolutely takes that as his cue to laugh - a loud, raucous, vaguely unhinged sound.]
MnahahahAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! NIPPLE SALADS!!
[As for Zer0, he has nothing to add to any of this. He just silently glances between Krieg and Gaige, a red ". . ." blipping up in front of his face plate. Sigh.]
All right! So, since this is the first TABcast, how about Krieg and I answer some of your viewer questions? And we can probably force Zer0 to help, somehow.
[PUBLIC -> PRIVATE]
You don't have to worry, I -- oh, wait, hangon...
[She messes with the settings for a moment, then switches it to a private feed.]
There we go. Anyway, I won't say how much of a bounty is on my head, but I will say there is a bounty on my head.
[PRIVATE]
...
A what.
Why?
[PRIVATE]
[Hm. Okay, no, he probably won't accept that answer alone.]
And Eden-5's law enforcement is corrupt as fuck. They think building robots is "unauthorized technology" and "dangerous" and a whole bunch of bull like that.
[PRIVATE]
[No, because what's a science fair.]
So you're in trouble cause you're building like. Drones and stuff?
[PRIVATE]
But between you and me, I'm pretty sure the cops wanted my blueprints for their own, sooo...
[She shrugs helplessly.] Like I said. Corrupt. As. Fuck.
[PRIVATE]
No, dude, we're like. Super alive and stuff. Not just robots okay? Okay. I mean, I'm kinda used to humans getting confused, but other guys aren't so chill about it.
So head's up.
[He's trying to be helpful here.]
But yeah that sounds like major no fun. Sorry, man.
[PRIVATE]
I'm not about to doubt something like that, but I mean, like...
Okay, so he [because apparently this project of hers is a 'he' now] has a basic AI and everything. He's not super smart yet -- if he sees me hurt, he tries to recharge my shield generator, as if that's gonna help -- but he's making decisions and threat assessments all his own.
And honestly? My AI is a little shitty compared to the things Hyperion cooks up. Like Claptrap, he has feelings, easily-bruised little feelings. He makes plans, he hires minions, he grieves over being the last of his kind.
So, I dunno. Not to get philosophical here, but if we're gonna talk about it -- where's the line? What makes you guys alive and mine not-alive?
[PRIVATE]
But us bots? Nobody just made us? Like. Ratchet said sparks pop out of the ground like "potatoes", whatever those are.
But that's the thing -- we've got sparks. And like, you can't copy that kinda stuff? I think? If you take 'em out or crush 'em, we're just straight up... gone.
Poof.
Y'know?
[PRIVATE]
[She sounds weirded out by that, in a way that surprises herself. But it's probably for different reasons than her new friend would expect.]
[Obviously, she's familiar with the concept of a golem. She's Jewish, at least within the broadest sense that "technically" can be stretched. But as much as she otherwise relishes the parallels to Dr. Frankenstein, she hates the idea that Deathtrap is nothing more than that, a golem -- that he isn't the friend she views him as, and she may as well have spent her time playing with dolls.]
[And Claptrap? The depth of personality and emotion he showed was ridiculous. And yes, she knew all about the Turing Test and everything else, but if one could cast doubt on Claptrap, then they had to cast doubt on everything, organic or machine. Hyperion had, for all intents and purposes, created an AI that was alive.]
[... Hyperion. Her mind sticks on that detail for a moment, starts connecting dots, creates a theory...]
Hear me out, big guy. There's a company out there that knows how to take living things apart and put them back together. Living things, with everything that makes them who they are. They've done it to me... um... way more times than I wanna admit, and I'm still me? And even Maya, she's a Siren, and if you could reproduce a Siren then they would be making a whole copy-paste army of Sirens. But they can't, yet they can still reassemble her...
Is it possible, maybe, that they know enough about souls and shit that they could make something alive?
[PRIVATE]
Maybe?
[Sorry, Gaige. You're way, way more intelligent than he is. In several different ways. And more experienced, even. It's pretty black and white as far as he knows. If you have a spark, you're alive. If you don't, you're not.]
[That's just how it works, to him.]
Uhhhhh.... may... be...?
[Unfortunately, for her efforts, she gets a big, awkward, red-armored shrug.]
I knew a bot named Siren once! [Sideswipe what. That's not even. Related.]