video - this is stupid

[knaval]

Uh-- is this working? Hello?

[the screen picture is perfectly showing riptide's panicked expression.]

I have absolutely no idea-- uh. My name is Riptide! I was with the crew of the Moira, but now I have no idea where I am. Crazy, right? I think I passed out? I have no idea. Anyway, this is a call for help! I've been approached by people and-- it's awful! I need an extraction immediately!

[he groans dramatically.]

They want me to get a job! [he was recommended to get a job.] A job! Like-- like being employed somewhere! Being paid to have responsibilities! I think one of them even said I can buy a-- a place to live?! I... I need to sit down. I have literally been tortured before and I've never, at this exact moment, been more uncomfortable in my entire life!

Comments

[otiosity]

Sadly, yes. I don't think they know who I am.

[knaval]

Who are you?

[otiosity]

Champion of Kirkwall.

You would think a title like that would make it so you don't have to work, hm?

[knaval]

That's fancy! What did you do to be Champion? Is it like, actual world saving stuff or just won a drinking competition champion? Cause honestly, both are impressive.

[otiosity]

I killed the giant oxman who was rampaging through the city and held all the nobles captive. Sadly, no one appreciates my drinking as much as they did that.

[knaval]

Well, obviously humans have skewed priorities. You know what I was known for, briefly? Winning a drinking contest against a point one percenter. I mean, I almost legitimately died, but not a lot of people can do that! You know what a lot of people can do? Pick up a gun and shoot a guy in the face with it!