video - this is stupid

[knaval]

Uh-- is this working? Hello?

[the screen picture is perfectly showing riptide's panicked expression.]

I have absolutely no idea-- uh. My name is Riptide! I was with the crew of the Moira, but now I have no idea where I am. Crazy, right? I think I passed out? I have no idea. Anyway, this is a call for help! I've been approached by people and-- it's awful! I need an extraction immediately!

[he groans dramatically.]

They want me to get a job! [he was recommended to get a job.] A job! Like-- like being employed somewhere! Being paid to have responsibilities! I think one of them even said I can buy a-- a place to live?! I... I need to sit down. I have literally been tortured before and I've never, at this exact moment, been more uncomfortable in my entire life!

Comments

[beautifulspaceraptor]

Alright, consider yourself hired then. If anyone asks you for paperwork, just fill in that you're employed by Nihlus Kryik, company name: Fried Circuits.

[knaval]

Awesome. That's the tab name?

[RIPTIDE NO]

[beautifulspaceraptor]

... You know what. I'm coming over and giving you a crash course in basic finances.

[ Spirits give him some manner of patience. ]

And if you put anything under that tab, I will find you and put adverts for my business on your face until you've paid it all back.

[knaval]

I wasn't really taught much math when they were shoving how to murder people into my head ten seconds after I came online! Money is hard!

[and riptide is even worse at dealing with it than you might think. or maybe exactly as bad as you might think.]