video; after the savrii invite the moirans to their home

[ventifact]

[it's been a while since rey has shown her face on the network. this will be the first time she's used the TAB to do so, and she's unceremoniously stuck it to bb-9's... face. the droid beeps softly, letting rey know that the video is recording. the scavenger is sitting cross-legged with her back to a wall, her staff laid across her knees and her pack beside her. she does not look pleased. in fact, she is frowning very deeply. she isn't very comfortable actually talking to people, but this is important, so she's making the effort.]

Wasn't there a point to all this?

[she pauses, knowing she should probably be more specific.]

The planets, the months of travel, everything— [her voice has been getting louder, so she stops for a breath. she has to calm herself down, pushing flyaway hairs from her face.]

We were supposed to be able to go home. We wasted a fracking year on that moon—if we'd gotten here a year sooner, would this all have been the same? We all saw the corpses on the way here. They died for this—some of us died for this. Coming to this hub, finding this working Ingress... that was supposed to be the end. But now we're just going to go to another planet, another unknown, and what? Live there? Or will there be another promise made, another contract to sign? Another delay to our return?

That's shit. We all know it's shit.

[rey sighs, closing her eyes and not speaking for a few more moments. she's tired, and just wants to go back to jakku. she just wants to go back to her old life, since what was supposed to be her new life seems nigh impossible now. she reaches forward to shut off the TAB, mumbling one more sentence under her breath:]

Why wasn't it the end?

Comments

[ventifact]

This is just turning into a series of things we've tried and failed at.

[very pessimistic, but there isn't any bite to her words. she's talked out a lot of her frustrations already, and now she's just exhausted. she'd thought leaving jakku for good had been the end of the part of her life where all she did was wait, but here she is again, forced to do exactly that. it had been different when she had chosen to stay on jakku, even if some long-buried emotion had compelled her to. this time, she had been ready to go, ready to get on with her journey--but now she can't. it's an impossible situation.]

[greyate]

[ Jean can't help but give a weak laugh at that, her expression amused but also very tired. ]

Isn't that just... life in general? We try, we fail. Sometimes we don't. But isn't that what they always say? To keep trying until you succeed?

[ Maybe she's trying to convince herself as much as Rey. ]

[ventifact]

[hearing someone say it aloud instead of letting her negative thoughts cloud her mind is actually... helping. this entire journey still seems kind of pointless, but at least jean is trying to talk her out of this pit of frustration.]

Sounds like something a Jedi would say.

[she's never met yoda.]

[greyate]

[ That gets a more genuine smile, Jean shaking her head as she remembers that she has in fact witnessed Jedi wisdom. ]

I wish I were that wise.

[ She shrugs. Maybe it was her own experiences in trying to control her powers and fighting Apocalypse that she was able to realize this sort of thing. ]

But sometimes that's all we can do. Keep trying. We can't just give up because we're pissed off. We've come too far for that.

[ Been through too much, even in her short time on the ship compared to the others that had been traveling longer. ]

[ventifact]

[they'd come too far. rey had thought she'd gone too far waiting for her family to give it up--but honestly, she simply hadn't gone anywhere with her life at all. so maybe jean is right. maybe now their best bet is to just get it over with and move on.]

As long as nobody expects me to stop being pissed off.