[voice]

[ryuuzaki]

[Ryuuzaki's low voice is accented in a way that people from places other than the U.K. might think of as "generically English," and when the message begins, his tones are pleasant and measured without being effusive.]

Hello, everyone.

The Ingress has brought us to the Moira from any number of places. When I meet someone, I can't say whether our similarities will outweigh our differences, or vice-versa... when you're this far from home, even small commonalities can seem important. It's led me to be curious about the broad strokes of everyone's backgrounds.

[A pause, as he approaches his real question.]

What can you tell me about the government in the place you came from before this? Both the form of government and, if possible, specific names of leaders.

If it wasn't your original home, I'd be interested in hearing about that, too, even down to what year it was for you.

If you'd prefer to answer privately, that's all right with me. I can promise you my discretion.

Thank you.

Comments

[voice]

[mttbrandlegs]

[What an interesting question. Mettaton decides that, out of curiosity's sake, he'll answer it. What could it hurt?

The voice that responds to Ryuuzaki's query reverberates with a distinct metallic ring.]

The government in the Underground was a monarchy, presided over by our king, Asgore. I don't think knowing anything that simple requires discretion, darling! But what does this base information really do for you?

Furthermore, may I know about your government structure as well?

[ryuuzaki]

Oh, I'm afraid I've traveled quite a bit... I can't say that I'm particularly attached to any one governmental structure. I'm a British citizen, however.

[This is technically true, but that isn't always the passport he presents, nor do any of his passports have the same name, or his real name.]

The government there is parliamentary, with a constitutional monarch... that is, she occupies a ceremonial and advisory role, but elected officials generally do the actual governing.

What kind of king is Asgore? He seems to have more power than a constitutional monarch would, but how does he use it?

[mttbrandlegs]

Oh yes. He did, anyway! The entire Underground looked to him for guidance, when they weren't looking to me for entertainment.

[It was a little funny, actually. After Asgore's son had died and he had declared war on humanity, hope had been drained from the populace, and Mettaton was quite proud to have suffused a bit back just by virtue of being an entertainment bot.]

He used his power to the best of his ability, I suppose!! Now he's just a fellow with hobbies like hedge-trimming and collecting sundries! It suits him!

[Of course, Mettaton doesn't neglect what he's been told of where this human was from. Because he found humans very interesting, and thus far hadn't encountered a British citizen! He wanted to ask what it was like there in more detail, but he exercises self control...mostly.]

Can you tell me more? Not just the politics, but what it's like where you're from! I'm dying to know~

[ryuuzaki]

We like tea.

[He says it drily. It's true, but also a kind of joke, and he lets a beat hang in the air before he continues in a more conversational tone..]

In all honesty, it's green. Trees, flowers, that sort of thing. Pleasant in the summer, cool in the winter. I'm from one of the smaller cities, near the coast. The larger cities are different... they're more crowded, but there's also often more variety in them.

[He decides to hold onto the thought of exactly why Asgore's hobbies changed so drastically for the moment, and briefly pursues another tack.]

Looking to you for entertainment?

[mttbrandlegs]

[Someone's got a sense of humor. Not the laughy kind either. It's not a bother, especially not when Mettaton's being appeased with information of a place he hasn't been yet. He seems very interested too, if his facial expressions are anything to go by.]

It all sounds enchanting! I'll have to pay a visit sometime!! When I'm able. Non-uniform weather patterns are still new to me, and so are the varied biomes!

[Huh. Wasn't he asked a question? Mettaton must have gotten caught up in human stuff. Whoops!]

...Oh! Right, I was the only form of entertainment in the Underground, since I was the only celebrity! As a result, it was my shows on TV, all the time! Everyone loved me!!

[ryuuzaki]

If you visit, mind the queues.

[That's not dry, and it may be hard to tell whether or not he's joking. He is, but seriously, mind the queues.]

A celebrity... that's very interesting. What did you do on your television show, to entertain everyone?

[mttbrandlegs]

[The warning is logged away, but any response is forgone in order to talk about himself. Anyone who wants to hear about the fabulous Mettaton will get all the intel they could ever want, from the source!!]

Oh goodness, where to begin?! I did cooking shows, game shows, reality TV, news broadcasts, and of course, I did my own commercials!! Everything was run by me! ["For me" is the implied part. He's quite vain.]

[ryuuzaki]

[The vanity hasn't gone unnoticed, but that kind of thing can still be useful, if and when you need someone to boast about themselves. Nothing strategic now, but it's tucked away for later.]

You really were the only celebrity. No one was ever interested in challenging your popularity?

[mttbrandlegs]

If they were, I wasn't aware of it~

[Mettaton says it earnestly enough, but is that entirely true? Who knows?!]

I did have call-ins and guest stars though. It really does wonders for the ratings!!

[ryuuzaki]

What sort of guest stars?

[L can't determine yet whether or not Mettaton would actually have tolerated any challenges to his popularity. He suspects not, but it seems possible that guest stars wouldn't have constituted anything of the sort.]

You didn't risk making celebrities out of them?

[If one was the King, however....]

[mttbrandlegs]

Well, like little Frisk, for example!! First human guest star I had, and they shot my ratings through the roof!! It's a shame they damaged me in the process, but I suppose it wasn't their fault. I do come on quite strong as a television personality!!

[Yeah...he's kind of downplaying and lying by omission there. Frisk was only on his show because he owed Alphys a favor, and after giving that up, he wanted to murder a child for his own selfish agenda.]

Anyway, before that, no one wanted to be a celebrity, darling. They just wanted to watch me! I don't blame them, I am pretty great!!

[While it isn't a lie...Mettaton didn't go too far out of his way to raise anyone up. He's a little to self-centered for that. Besides!! No one helped him succeed, aside from Alphys building him this body.]

[ryuuzaki]

Damaged?

[His tone is only coolly curious, with no indication of any intent in it.]

[mttbrandlegs]

Yes, damaged. We were, ah. Staging a fight, you could say!! The human damaged my core and caused my arms and legs to eject. There was some damage to my battery as well, but it's all been sorted out now. No lasting harm done!!

[What could he lose to share? It's not as if he holds it against Frisk.]

[ryuuzaki]

Ah. You're inorganic.

[It may be phrased as a statement, but it's still a question.]

What made Frisk want to appear on your show to begin with?

[mttbrandlegs]

Yes, I am! And here I thought the voice would give me away!!

[Being inorganic is great! Robots can be repaired much more easily than organic beings. Broken bones? Haha, not likely! Pain? Well...Mettaton kind of dug it in small doses!! It's the thrill of ratings-spiking violence that keeps him going!

As for the other question...Mettaton pauses, considering if he cares to protest against answering it. Mmm...nah, not really. If he's over it, this fine gentleman can't bother him with any judgments!]

Ohhh, it wasn't voluntary, dear. Their participation was mandatory!!

[ryuuzaki]

[The voice might have given it away, and yet... two and a half years of meeting all sorts of people means it's better not to make that kind of immediate assumption.]

So you wanted Frisk to appear on your show? Why?

[mttbrandlegs]

Mm, that's a good question!! Here's a better one before I continue; why are you so curious to know? We've strayed far and away from the initial topic of governments.

[The subtext is clear; What's your angle, buddy?]

[ryuuzaki]

Oh, I'm just naturally curious.

[That's somewhat true, especially in cases where he's being given little enough of the story for it to be confusing, but he's also willing to let people keep talking if they seem to want to and if it will lead to more information.]

Also, it's very different from my own past experiences. I've never had the chance to talk to a celebrity before!

[ :) !]

[mttbrandlegs]

[Hmm...Mettaton isn't fully satisfied with the answer. He feels there's some insincerity there, but then again, maybe this guy was legitimately curious about the workings of his show!!

The robot could hardly fault the fellow, he was pretty interesting. And his shows? Even more so!]

Ohoho! What a lovely little flatterer you are!! [A brief metallic chuckle escapes him.] Anyway, I was paying my creator a favor!! She wanted to be closer to the human, so I made it easier. You see, I'm a wonderful actor, so all I had to do was play the part of a killer robot and allow Dr. Alphys to save Frisk from all the "dangers" I was putting them in!

A fun little game for a while, I admit!!

[ryuuzaki]

[I wonder, he thinks. Very likely, Frisk wouldn't have found it fun.]

I suppose there was a reason for this charade.

Also, was Dr. Alphys employed by the King?

[He wouldn't be surprised, if she'd created the only celebrity in the kingdom. But he could be wrong.]

[mttbrandlegs]

[Well, maybe not at the time!! But they warmed up to it. He'd swear it!!

Ryuuzaki might be interested to find that Alphys hadn't initially created a "celebrity" at all. But he'd have to do a little more snooping for that.]

How astute of you! Yes indeed, Dr. Alphys was the Royal Scientist!! And yes, there was, as I said, her desire to be close to the human, which led to her fabricating the entire affair. I made the plan work, but it was her idea to be the hero in this little charade. I don't blame her for finding the child to be very intriguing though, humans have a tendency to be quite interesting!! So, you know. I went along with it for a little while!!

I suppose it was for the better I did. Dear Alphys made a lovely friend out of the situation.

[And...Mettaton was not referring to himself. He wasn't really a good friend.]

[ryuuzaki]

Did Frisk ever find out what really happened? They must be very forgiving.

[He's beginning to get the impression, from other things he's seen, that Toriel probably hadn't liked this situation at all.]

You mentioned cooking earlier. What sort of things did you make?

[mttbrandlegs]

[The less Toriel knew of the actual situation, the better for everyone, since attempted murder might not have come off too well.]

Frisk knows! I told them all about Alphys was doing right before I attempted to take their soul!

[He pauses, realizing that sounded a little...cold on his part. Oh well, it's not as if there wasn't resolution between him and the small human at this point. He's not an actual child murderer!]

Clearly I was unsuccessful. For the better, I say!! The human turned out far more capable than I gave them credit for!! Oh but anyway, cooking's a much more interesting subject! I've made cake before, among other things!

[ryuuzaki]

[Oh, all of the rest of that is being set aside for the moment: take their soul? Instead, he focuses on something else, pretending his interest lies there.]

What kind of cake?

[He's careful to sound enthusiastic, but it's not hard to fake.]

[mttbrandlegs]

Oh, any really! I made a good joke of whipping up a cake with human soul baked in it for that whole acting to-do, but I also excel at chocolate cake!!

[He's still learning what other flavors suit the human palate, since apparently only a select few enjoyed snails just as much as the next monster.]

Are you fond of such things? [The enthusiasm doesn't go unnoticed.] I find that many humans do enjoy indulging in sweets, so I must put in more effort into mastering more recipes if I plan to carry on with a cooking show!!