Tailgate (
daintylegs) wrote in
thisavrou2016-02-08 03:18 pm
Entry tags:
video
[Tailgate feels just a little big disoriented. If he had to provide a specific description of how he's feeling right now, he might say that it feels like some otherworld entity decided they couldn't handle him and decided to stick him in a freezer for two weeks. Though if actually asked how he feels, he'll just stick with the shorter explanation of "not too great." It was Swerve who pushed the fourth-wall button, after all, not him.
Having gotten off track in his own inner monologue, Tailgate decides to finally address the network. For the first time, as it turns out.]
Sooo... Do you ever feel like you fell asleep for a long time and suddenly you have no idea what's going on? Because believe it or not, that's happened twice in my life now.
So, uh, my name is Tailgate! Hi everyone! I'm Cybertronian, from Cybertron, my favourite colour is blue, I'm an Autobot and... um... [Oh jeez he's making himself sound so boring!] I... really like human movies, and I saved my world once. That's a good introduction I think. It's nice to meet all of you! I hope we can be friends.
[He fluffed it, he can feel it in his robot bones.]
Having gotten off track in his own inner monologue, Tailgate decides to finally address the network. For the first time, as it turns out.]
Sooo... Do you ever feel like you fell asleep for a long time and suddenly you have no idea what's going on? Because believe it or not, that's happened twice in my life now.
So, uh, my name is Tailgate! Hi everyone! I'm Cybertronian, from Cybertron, my favourite colour is blue, I'm an Autobot and... um... [Oh jeez he's making himself sound so boring!] I... really like human movies, and I saved my world once. That's a good introduction I think. It's nice to meet all of you! I hope we can be friends.
[He fluffed it, he can feel it in his robot bones.]

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Now Tiffany, you didn't even call on me after our date. Don't think I'm going to forgive you just like that.
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[a pause.
in a more worried tone:] Tailgate? They got you too!
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[He claps his hands together and gives Varric the most falsely apologetic look he can manage.]
I didn't mean to leave you hanging!
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[Tailgate squeals with absolute glee and claps his hands together. He knows your face and he couldn't be happier.]
Oh thank god you're here! You have no idea what I've been suffering through lately. Are you staying at our room or do you have one by yourself?
If you do, do you think I can room with you?
Please say yes.
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so, like, way cooler
and nobler and heroic...er
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um okay so among our species the autobots and the decepticons were two factions who fought a four million year long civil war with each other. the wars over but the factions are still a thing. every other cybertronian on the ship is autobot i believe.
we're the good guys.
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What happened? Are there other people here? Cause, no offence buddy, but someone was described as tall and muscular and--
[yeah.]
Uh, anyway. I'm on Nomo deck. Totally got my own room. [he snorts.] Why, you stuck with a bunch of humans?
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I've been rooming with Megatron and Ultra Magnus for the past month.
[He pauses as he allows Riptide to understand the sheer horror of his situation.]
If you want to know what that's like, just imagine trying to have fun right next to two giant fun black holes. You can try, but reality just warps itself into an unrelenting state of blandness. It's been terrible.
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i think we're the good guys. we seem to be good people and decepticons seem pretty bad.
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Tailgate, listen. You can stay in my room as long as you need it.
[he presses a hand to his forehead.]
By the cannons of Thunderclash, I can't believe those two, of everyone-- how do you guys even fit in the same room?
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How long have you been here anyway?
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I'm not going to argue with you about whether you're the good guys. Just pointing out they think so too.
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[riptide shakes his head.]
That's, uh. Nice of them, to shove you all in together like that. Think I'm the one with the kibble that broke the Dinobot's back?
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[He heaves a long sigh - with a hint, just a hint of a shaky breath.]
No, I don't know if I'll ever quite be over you. I think... I think we just need some
[It's about then that he loses it and snorts with laughter - but, ever the...uh, professional, he does try to turn it into a loud, fake sob.]
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How do you get around the ship anyway? You don't have tires and the hallways can get kinda small...
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[riptide can already think of like 3 places tailgate could sit in his room. exciting!!!]
Holoform. Thinking of a complex system of mirrors, though.
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im not trying to deflect the conversation or anything but what's your name?
Re: text
I'm Texas.
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That's pretty rough. I'm sorry for you.
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Time? Yes, I agree.
Fare thee well Valerie, I hope we meet again in less heart-breaking circumstances.
[He dramatically shuts off his device. Only to switch it back on a few seconds later.]
So wanna go for a drink sometime?
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Anyway! I think my new job will need me to spacewalk a lot! Fun! I hope! What did you get?
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You should come down and say hi sometime.
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He hasn't been too bad, has he?
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And also...
[He glances around before leaning in. The action alone should be enough to let Riptide know that he has some pretty juicy gossip.]
We were on this planet and did this whole matching thing, romantically I mean, and guess who Megatron and Ultra Magnus got? [He doesn't even pause to give Riptide a chance to answer.] They got each other!
Can you imagine? Megs and Mags? A match made in the Allspark if you ask me.
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[riptide covers a mouth with his hand, stifling a giggle.]
Oh my god, someone needs to tell Nautica that right away. She came up with Megs verses Mags. It was almost a prediction!
[he can almost hear nautica's horrified gasping.]
So, what, are they like... conjunx now, or something? Fake conjunx? Did we get any money from it?
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[He nods sagely as if that answers Riptide's questions.]
I think that's another good reason for me to leave. Give 'em their privacy and all.
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[He glances off to the side awkwardly before correcting himself.]
I mean. I've never met friendly alien robots, anyway.
Uh. Anyway, it's nice to meet you Tailgate. I'm Beast Boy! Oh, and I'm human, despite appearances.
[He gives aliens a pass on the green skin thing.]
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[he shakes his head.]
Good plan. Really good plan. Do you have any stuff? I can carry it up for you if want.
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Well, there's no time like the present. What are you doing in... Oh, say, about an hour?
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Where do you want to hang out anyway?
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I mean i think it's a nice name
is it normal to name people after states? what about cities? and countries?
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Nice to meet you Beast Boy! There aren't a lot of us left so I can see why you wouldn't. If we exist in your universe at all that is, I'm still not clear how this works...
Hey! This might sound a little weird, but if you're a human male, then does that mean you play video games?
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[ Of course, that's not the full story of why she was named after that particular state, but it'll do. ]
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Why yes, I am a human male, thank you for noticing. And heck yeah, I flipping love video games! Why you asking?
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[He says with a barely-disguised tone of excitement.]
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[Pity. He was kind of distantly hoping that Tailgate was going to mention that he might have some video games on hand.]
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[How does one cope with such bitter disappointment?]
I wonder if we can hunt down someone smart and have the make a game thing for us. Then we can play together!
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You pick the place - I can fit everywhere on this boat, I'm not so sure about you.
[Beat.] Not that I'm calling you fat.