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[Niko has had a little bit of a confusing week. He didn't expect to be asked along on a diplomatic mission; usually not anything he's good at (in his mind). But he came along, figuring he was there as bodyguard more than anything else.]

[But now he's returned, and he wants to check in.]

Hey, ah.... So I just got back. I had to go with Thán for a mission and now he has a new boyfriend for peace purposes I guess. I am not really sure what happened there. Sort of like an arranged marriage? [He's actually kind of suspicious of this whole-matchmaking thing now. He's always disliked match-making on some level, but there is something deeply unsettling about it here. Just how mandatory and committing it seems.]

[He doesn't hate the match he was given, not at all. But he knows there might be people they're even better suited to.]

Look, I am a little nervous about this big business here. Capitalism is shit, government is shit, and is bad enough when taking advantage of lonely people. But I think we are going to have to be sure to be good to the new guy because we saw what happened the last time we fucked up diplomacy.

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Shit, I knew there was something fishy about this place. That survey...the mandatoryness of it? Considering we haven't paid them anything, I'm not sure what their angle is...but I don't like it.

[Ratchet comes from a world where big business was the de facto driving force of the socio-economy. He knows how to be suspicious of anything with logo attached to it. He hesitates for the briefest of moments.]

What happened at the meeting? Are you allowed to talk about it?

Wait what. Arranged marriage between two men?

Nothing very dramatic. Just that Thán was matched but other captains were not. [He's still curious about that.] To prove the match is good, and show they have faith in this [bullshit] system, they send this man. This man is the son of Frederick Link, person who is company owner.

Basically we will have financial royalty on board.

[And it's very dubious to him.]

On the last boat I was on, there were two guys that started as male and as brothers that decided to have baby and then were female because they decide to be so. [At least that's how he interpreted it.]

Not to mention my own girlfriend is not even human. I mean, the parts still pretty much the same, but shit gets very complex out here.

What happened the last time?

[sounds like it might be a laugh.]

Edited 2016-01-10 21:32 (UTC)

A whole planet went to shit.

[He didn't really enjoy it, but it was his second blown up planet in a relatively short period of time... to be honest he probably wouldn't have liked it any more if it was his first.]

Ha! Bloody brilliant!

[good job on the "don't be a weird asshole" thing, aurelia.]

What was it, giant laser? Gaseous implosion? Mind eating slugs?

Now, now, some of us have to make a living off capitalism. [He doesn't sound at all scandalised; that's just, like, Niko's opinion, bro.]

I'm amazed this hasn't taken off back in Kirkwall. I know a lot of people who'd be in this like nugs in a dung pile if they'd only thought of it.

A lot of people have to make a living off communism too and they fuck that up pretty well. Both of them know pretty good how to take advantage of people.

[He's used to being on the bottom rung of those ladders. No fondness for power structures there.]

I would much prefer systems that let us choose each other. Or at least one with more choice. It's not good to give out so much personal information, I don't think. [Whether it's in the guise of curing loneliness or not.]

We did it. By stupid fucked up accident. If we had done what they said? They still would have their planet.

It wasn't really a good time. Is lucky this ship has a cure for death. Some people didn't make it.

[He had to go to the hold for flipping a fucking table afterwards. He's a little bitter, but by the grace of god did he manage to not kill someone in his anger fit. Just chucked around some inanimate objects.]

[okay aurelia has more comments about how the planet won't be missed and lololol and blah blah blah BUT]

A cure for death? Obnoxious.

So the moral of the story is, people will fuck anything up. Or everyone has to make a living. Or both.

[Something for everyone to agree on!]

Oh, I don't know - they haven't exactly forced me into marriage with the giant robot they matched me with. [Cue Varric softly praying 'robot' is the right word.] An arranged marriage for diplomacy is one thing, but forced marriage in the name of money hasn't happened yet.

[He sighs.] Now that I've said that, I'll wake up tomorrow with a pair of comically mismatched wedding rings, a date and a dress code in my inbox.

Here, it is almost mandatory to participate. But consider this, now they know everything about you. And I do not remember any restrictions about where that information can go later.

Capitalism, government, I do not know where you're from. But you let them go unchecked? It becomes bad enough that I have no favorable words for it. There is a business that blows up planets for money, and on such a scale it is legal for them to do this.

I'm not too fond of it, but I guess the people who survived like the idea.

[A guy with a deathwish that is also too proud to let just anyone kill him would rather the risk be there.]

I have to find out you're back along with everybody else, do I? [It's obvious teasing - she sounds exactly the opposite of annoyed.]

Did anything happen? [Well, of course things happened - Thán got a boyfriend, for one. But she doesn't mean that - she means what they talked about before he left. Was there trouble - did he have to kill anyone. That kind of happening.]

What do you think they can do with that information? The tests, the survey - if anyone even told the truth. That's a genuine question - I can still count on my hands how many days it's been since I understood...much of anything, as it happens.

[In Thedas, he could have confidently said there was nothing anyone could do with his information that would bother him, because the people who really wanted to know and would really cause him trouble...already knew. Beyond that, there was unsolicited junk mail and maybe the occasional "have you accepted the light of Andraste into your life" home call.

Here, the only thing he can say with confidence is that there's shit all he can say with any confidence.]

I can't say I understand how big business works when you pull out to a scale of 'blowing up planets for money', either. I work on the city level. Occasionally country-level when I get really lucky. Or unlucky, depending on your point of view.

[Varric: a lot of empty talk, but a lot of being very happy to admit he doesn't have any idea what the sodding hell you are talking about, ser.]

Well, that rules out natural selection.

[she hums lightly.]

Do tell me more about the planet. What happened? Why did this pish posh crew have to save it?

It was a planet where someone could get images of their future or of their past in a reflection. Good looking place, but apparently our captains had been there before. Pissed then off by stealing. I don't care about stealing, but they asked us to leave and we should have known to fuck off about then.

Turns out one of the crew runs risk of turning into a giant rampage monster. When they tried to make him leave? He did just that. Even if they eventually caught him, he still damaged something on the ship. It screwed with the planet somehow and bye bye world. Some people died as it fell apart.

Which crew member? I do hope he was left behind, it seems awfully reckless to keep someone like that aboard a finite area in the vacuum of space.

[she sniffs lightly.]

Ah, c'est la vie. Suppose they had to learn that lesson the hard way.

No. He's still around.

Might as well be. It is only by miracle I am not so dangerous when I get angry.

[Sometimes he very nearly is. He just needs weapons for it.]

Luckily he has pretty even temper most of the time, and now we have a thing to hold him.

Knowing my luck, in the time I would say proper hello then the man would get himself killed by a confused crew member.

No. It was all very uneventful but for this.

Very, very normal. [And that means he's suspicious.]

[A new boyfriend, Niko, no. That was about a hundred steps farther into whatever it was going on between himself and Benjamin than he wanted to go.]

I do believe we should all be more careful. In general, yes, but here certainly. The tests haven't always been mandatory.

[ miles met with thán just after he got back to his room, knows all about this arrangement. knows exactly how uncomfortable thán is with it. it doesn't add up, and he doesn't like it. miles' voice is unusually serious. ]

Niko, what the hell happened down there?

[If you take a guy home he counts as boyfriend. Tough luck friend.]

Yes, it is not good that they are now. I know that much. [He's all about privacy of information, when it can be maintained. He's had too many people around him suffer because they were so easy to find (either because of his bad decisions or because he was paid to do it).]

Edited 2016-01-11 03:19 (UTC)

It happened exactly as I say. They made a deal so that only one of the captains is in the system, and for that Link sends his own son to be with Thán. Supposedly it is to show confidence in their choices.

Supposedly.

But what is done is done and he has agreed to it. And for this, they have kept details of the others private.

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