[he's never really imagined what he would do differently, if he was standing in that field of flowers again. everything that had led up to 1964 had already been long in play before john and the boss had ever really been important to each other. he knows now, one way or the other, the boss would have found her own field to die in someday. there was nothing he could have ever done to save her.
but he thinks, now that he's presented with the scenario, that he would've die alongside her. if only to spare everyone else he's ever known to this point the grief of his very existence.]
[private]
[he's never really imagined what he would do differently, if he was standing in that field of flowers again. everything that had led up to 1964 had already been long in play before john and the boss had ever really been important to each other. he knows now, one way or the other, the boss would have found her own field to die in someday. there was nothing he could have ever done to save her.
but he thinks, now that he's presented with the scenario, that he would've die alongside her. if only to spare everyone else he's ever known to this point the grief of his very existence.]