text;

[nishizono]

[ In light of current events, Tetora's back to his old haunts on the Ingress. Which isn't too bad! Except for one small thing. ]

hey does this mean we're all fucking grounded? in space???

Comments

[nishizono]

you were in jail
on purpose
for pirate treasure

you couldn't have just looked up the blueprint for the place and posed as maintenance?

[sketchycharacter]

blueprints didn't exist in the 1600s and it's not like the place was open for visitor tours
besides
sneaking in was more interesting

[nishizono]

but architectural plans did, didn't they? michaelangelo has a ton of shit on it.

whatever.

did you kill people too?

[sketchycharacter]

got in a few prison yard fights but no

[nishizono]

huh
kinda lame but that's fine i guess

why did you want to be a treasure hunter or whatever it is you do?

[sketchycharacter]

why not?

[nishizono]

...but why

[ it genuinely throws him, because he's not had any relatable ambitions in life. "death to everyone i know" is not a life ambition, it's a vendetta. ]

[sketchycharacter]

because office jobs are boring
i've heard

[nishizono]

oh fuck yeah they are
they're disgusting honestly

[sketchycharacter]

well there you go

[nishizono]

but why treasure hunter specifically
you could be a million other things if you wanted, why that one

[sketchycharacter]

what makes you think i still do it?
the panama thing was thirteen years ago

[nishizono]

well i don't know how time works here
i've only ever been a juvenile delinquent

[sketchycharacter]

i was 22 at the time
it's been 13 years since then not counting the space time
i was a juvenile delinquent too but i'm pretty sure you could still do the math

[nishizono]

oh man you're old

why is everyone old around here, it's starting to get really suspicious

[sketchycharacter]

i'm 35 not decrepit

[nishizono]

still about 15 years older than i am
no arthritis yet?

[sketchycharacter]

no not yet
give it time

[nishizono]

do you have the time though
i mean you're pretty ancient

[sketchycharacter]

it's okay
in my treasure-hunting days i discovered the tree of life that leaks sap to turn people immortal

[This is not actually a lie.]

[nishizono]

but does it keep you from aging
because you could be immortal and also a wizened old character stuck in a wheelchair

[ you know, just the important questions ]

[sketchycharacter]

ask me again in a few decades

[nishizono]

you're sucking the joy out of this conversation with this stage actor crap answers

[sketchycharacter]

it's actually my goal to suck all forms of joy out of everything
you caught me

[nishizono]

well obviously you need a different superpower
like shrinking
or glowing in the dark