text.

[insidiose]

Is there a way to look for someone specific here or do I have to wait until I stumble on them? I'd really like to find someone in particular and I'm not good with this technology yet even with the help I've gotten.

I guess what I'm trying to say is: if someone could help me find out if Miss Tina Goldstein is here, I would appreciate it very much.

Comments

[text;]

[welcomeprofessor]

I believe it has a directory, yes.

Unfortunately, I do not believe I recognize the name. Is she family?

[Look, it's a reasonable assumption. A very helpful one at that.]

[insidiose]

Oh. No. I don't have any family.

[ there's modesty, but she's terrified of him. he's not going to say that, of course. ]

She helped me once before. I need her.

[welcomeprofessor]

[If that isn't a line he's heard verbatim before from his students back home, it's close enough to act as a good stand-in definition of "cry for help."]

I'm sorry to hear that. Fortunately, while I think you'll also find your share of people with similar stories here, there are plenty of them also willing to extend a friendly hand.

[H I N T.]

[insidiose]

[ credence doesn't have much schooling other than "my mother is an insane religious nut hell-bent on getting rid of all magic in the world," but he's smart. smart enough to catch up on hints.

also smart enough to be a little wary of someone offering help after everything, but he still aches for kindness so much that— ]

I don't know how to talk about it and it's very personal.

[ it's an opening, anyway. ]

[welcomeprofessor]

It's alright. I won't ask for more than your comfortable with.

[And if he had a dollar for every time he'd heard this...well, he'd have a fourth inheritance. He knows he needs to be careful. It may not always be the same problem, or the same hurt, but the boy is troubled all the same.]

But we could start with something easier, like an introduction, perhaps?

[insidiose]

Okay. Thank you.

My name is Credence.

[ 'they seem nice,' one part of him says, while another screams 'so did the man that hurt you.' so he doesn't know what to do, naturally. eventually: ]

Are there people here that are different from other people? I mean really different.

[ and there it is. ]

wow pls ignore that dumbass typo forever ty

[welcomeprofessor]

[Oh. Oh. And there it is. Many times he's found over this tenure of running his school that he doesn't need the mind-reading to understand certain cues, and this is certainly one of those times. Sometimes the trauma, and even the mention of the term hurts, is just...telling. All on its own.]

That depends on what you mean by that, Credence. Where you see "different," I tend to see "special." Gifted, even.

[He pauses then and follows up with a second message as a better addendum to the part he's forgotten in all of that.]

It's a pleasure, by the way. I'm Charles Xavier. "Professor," if you feel inclined.

i literally did not even notice until you pointed it out

[insidiose]

[ credence doesn't answer for a long time and he's not sure why. when he does, he's still kind of scared to. ]

The only person that ever called me "special" hurt me.

[ that's all for a moment, though. he's so hungry for knowledge that he can't resist, though. ]

Professor? What do you teach?

good it wasn't ever there~~~

[welcomeprofessor]

[He scowls at the feed, for all the good it does. There's a smart "then they didn't understand what special means, did they?" reply that threatens, earmarked with a degree of righteous indignation, but that's a lot to heap on someone who's still trying to reach out, regardless of their past traumas.

It always seems to come back to this, doesn't it? Everyone he's met, near every student he's taught, they all come because something broke, or they were broken, and they needed help with control. Agency.]

An array of subjects, actually. What I specialize in, however, is helping troubled adolescents with control over those...differences.

[insidiose]

[ there are so many things he could say. he could ask after the subjects, he could change the subject to something else, he could... anything but the hurried desperation that had gotten him burned the first time - when he hadn't even known the problem was him. ]

You could help me control it? So I stop hurting people?

video;

[redshitlord]

Uhhhhhh... never heard of her?

So... probably not, man. I mean, probably not here, cause like. I've been here sooooo long and never heard of her.

[Cue the fingerguns.]

Make sense?

still text!

[insidiose]

[ ????????????? ??????????????????????????? ??????????//////////////

HE'S SO CONFUSED WHY IS THERE A GIANT MACHINE TALKING TO HIM anyway he's going to continue being polite. ]

How long have you been here?

[ ... ]

Thank you.

[redshitlord]

[Sorry bro this giant machine is "helping". At least, he thinks he is.]

Uhhhh...




A really... really long time?

[Sideswipe you're no longer helping.]

[welcomeprofessor]

Well, I'd need a look at what "it" is, but I can certainly try, yes.

[It may not be wholly reassuring, but it's...a start. And truth told, he does need to know what he's dealing with in order to begin the task of trying to wrap his mind around it. (In some cases, literally).]

[insidiose]

I've never really done it on purpose before. Only while I was upset or scared.

[ ...

...

... ]

You seem like someone that likes helping people. Or at least wants to.

[insidiose]

Well, she's not really, really old, so that makes sense.

[ look, he's trying. he's trying so much. ]

[redshitlord]

Wait, what?

Why's her being not really really old make sense?

[welcomeprofessor]

I know what it's like to be...different. Scared. Alone.

That isolation is not a fate I'd wish on anyone.

[insidiose]

I'm the only one at home.

That's what I was told. "There haven't been any here in hundreds of years."

[ of course, that was told to him in secret before the false graves knew it was him. maybe that was a lie too. ]

I'm supposed to be something else, but that something else got broken and turned into what I am.

[welcomeprofessor]

[At this point, he's unsure whether or not they're talking about the same sort of different, but that pales in comparison to that final part of the message.]

"Got broken"?

[He's unsure of what to make of it. He's heard of people falling out of sync with their mutations, he's lived first hand their inception and how quickly that lack of control can feel quite literally like the end of the world. And he's heard a mountain worth of theories on where mutation came from, his own original thesis buried in the middle somewhere when it seems it's constantly proven naive on the technical details.

(It was the 60s. Of course, everything was radiation. Except it never followed when his own manifested in the 40s and his sister had been born into it even earlier.)]

[insidiose]

I don't know how to describe it. It's all second-hand from what was told to me.

Everything I should have been able to do was pushed down inside me with no way out until it turned into something that just wants to hurt people.

[ and devour him from the inside out. sometimes he wonders if there's even a way to help him any more. ]

It killed a man that called my family freaks. It killed my ma when she said... things about my real mother. It tried to kill the man that lied to me.

[welcomeprofessor]

[It may not be a mutation. That does actually occur to him. But it sounds so familiar. (The abuse, or what Charles assumes must be, if it's so similar to the experiences he's better aware of, is very much a part of that. Why else would he call repression "broken"? He won't push, but he has a good idea.)]

It's not unheard of for uncontrolled abilities to manifest at times of high stress. If I can help, Credence, I will do my utmost.

[insidiose]

[ it's not surprising that credence didn't even realize it was abuse at all until so late in life. that's what happens, isn't it? you just assume things are that way for everyone. still, he knows what it is now. and how it hurt him. ]

Thank you. I want to be able to control it. I want to be able to be around other people like me. I've never been except once.

[welcomeprofessor]

Only once? You mean this woman you're looking for?

[insidiose]

Sort of. She's actually a witch though, I'm just me. I can't do things like her. I'm not a wizard like I'm supposed to be.