shadowblends: (❧ angry)
kurt wαgnєr [ɹǝןʍɐɹɔʇɥƃıu] ([personal profile] shadowblends) wrote in [community profile] thisavrou 2017-04-12 11:48 pm (UTC)

[And finally, for the first time since this conversation, Kurt looks unashamedly offended. She doesn't care, yet she continues to sit and judge his appearance and the poor life choices he's made with no thought to mention her own short-comings?

His lips twitch, fangs baring with a small growl, both hands curling into fists at his sides.]
I have never acted as if I am flawless or even a little bit gut. I have only ever been myself and should others accept me for who I am? Great. If not, even better, considering I don't need that sort of negativity around. I got enough of it from the-- [a beat, his features twisting into discomfort,] ... I got enough of it.

[Were he a more brash type of individual, Kurt might have reached for her wrist, pulled her back in and muttered something far more caustic, but he's not. Alternatively, he falls silent, looking uncomfortably tight-lipped before he clears his throat and backpedals another few paces.] I'm not gut. I've done things - terrible things that I cannot rectify and for the rest of my life, I will live with that. I never ask for anything, but if there's one thing I would ever wish for someone to understand, it would be that I'm not this charming, silver-tongued devil that everyone tries to make me out to be.

[He releases a harsh breath, takes another step back and reaches around to find the doorknob.] I'd also prefer it if people would get to know me before they decide to judge me for what I am, [another pause, the glint in those iridescent eyes sharpening,] because while I may be bad, by God, I'm sure trying to do my best to not be. Don't assume that you know as much.

[There it is - all laid out in a neat little pile for J to see. Kurt hasn't thought of himself as a 'decent' sort of being for a long time, having been forced to flee from his family, struggling with the circus in Munich, then the fight club in Berlin, both of his battles with Angel ... He's hurt people, made others bleed, taken their lives to protect his own and his friends. For the latter, he would sacrifice everything, but himself? Why, it felt almost selfish of him to want to live.

He stands there a moment longer, completely silent, except for his labored breathing. His head shakes and he pivots to face the door, clenching his fingers around the handle and pulling it open.]
... enjoy your chocolate, miss J.

[Then, unless she decides to stop him, he's out of there as quickly as he can manage.]

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