(no subject)

[realitywarped]

[Loki is, as always, smiling, apparently entirely unconcerned by the situation. And, to be fair- the situation isn't of his making, and it isn't currently proving particularly dangerous to any of the few people he might be inclined to be upset about getting harmed. He'll get upset later, if they are.

He waves at the camera, a brief wiggle of his fingers, before he folds them, leaning on the edge of a plain white workbench somewhere in a plain white room. There's a row of tools hanging on the wall behind him, but not much else.]

Hello- again, if we've met, or not, if you're one of the very easily timed influx of new arrivals. If you're one of those, welcome to the ship, you're probably not going to enjoy the stay terribly much, and no, once you've checked in you almost certainly can't leave. I'm Loki, for what that's worth.

[He tilts his head, eyes half-lidded, not quite meeting the camera. It's... not particularly Loki-ish to offer help, unprompted, but he supposes he might as well. Besides, he most likely isn't going to do it for free.]

I bring you one or two offers that may or may not help, considering the corpse at the feast and the fact we're once again likely to be number one on yet another planet's most wanted list- and speaking of which, perhaps we can not make this one implode?

[He's... committed enough genocide, thanks. Past life, but still his memories.]

But yes- firstly! I finally broke into one of the many locked rooms, thankfully one entirely free of deadly skeletons, and found- well-

[He pans the camera; the room is barely recognisable as a forge, but close enough. The actual forge, anvil, water bath, tools, although everything is kind of rounded off and matte and black.]

I've been experimenting, and of course things take time, but if the Ingress swallowed your perfectly serviceable weapon and you'd like a new one, I'm usually capable enough.

[He pans back to himself.]

Secondly- and you don't know what making this offer means, so appreciate it- I'm the god of tricks and being in places you really shouldn't be. So should you have an emergency, and you ask particularly nicely, I may be able to offer one or two magical disguises, perhaps an odd emergency portal to the surface. I'll accept bribery, fervent praise, or favours to be collected at a later date in payment.

Comments

Video

[takeitslow]

So you're like some kind of space arms dealer or something? Isn't that usually a back alley kind of thing?

[realitywarped]

I don't usually deal in weaponry, no. In this case- I can do it, and other people may be useful to me at some later point. Besides, if I started dealing in dark corners on this ship, I'd have more trouble than it's worth.

[He shrugs. If he was secretive about this, he'd have the hordes of heroes down on him like a ton of bricks. Better apparent transparency, so at least he can say he did tell people he was doing it.]

[takeitslow]

You don't think they're not going to cause you trouble now?

[It's an honest question, he's not sure yet how the morals on this ship skew.]


What do you usually deal in, if not weapons?

[realitywarped]

Mmm, but when I do things quietly, people always assume I'm up to something. Of course, they'll most likely assume I'm up to something else instead, but what can you do? A reputation is a reputation.

[The morals skew all over the place! But Loki is used to being thought of as Loki, so he's pre-emptively doing things to head it off.]

I'm not usually in business at all. I am a god of mischief, so mostly I cause it.

[takeitslow]

You know, I can get that.

[Not like he didn't have a bit of a rep himself, back home. Even if he wasn't that interested in shaking it.]

God? Seriously dude, that's a little much.

[realitywarped]

At least it's a double-edged weapon, I suppose. It can be very useful, when the right people know your reputation. Less useful when it's the inevitable hero brigade.

[Which, okay, is a little unfair, but sometimes it would be a lot easier to be not-evil if people didn't expect it so much.]

It's only a bit much if it were untrue. Still, I'm used to disbelief. No-one ever believes me, or in me, after all.

[takeitslow]

Got a hero brigade around here to give that trouble? You know, just asking,

Probably cause that kind of stuff isn't real and most people who go around calling themselves a god belong in the loony bin. You want belief, you have to prove yourself. Make miracles, smite some people, cause an earthquake. That kind of thing.

[realitywarped]

A few, yes. Does your world have the Avengers? There's a few around here, plus one or two more I don't recognise.

[Hey, it's a valid question, as far as Loki's concerned. He smiles widely, pointed and sharp, looking particularly mischievous for a moment.]

And if I am a god? Who am I likely to smite first, do you think? What miracles do you expect from a god of mischief?

[takeitslow]

Nope. Heard of it from some other people around here, but no. Not none at home. Unless they're being super uncover.

Dude, I don't know. [And a pause, because in the off chance the guy is a god, is he allowed to call him dude?] Aren't you supposed to pick who to smite? Or the kinds of miracles? I don't know. I don't do church. Wasn't there something about fish? I don't know how mischievous you can get with fish.